What would you do??

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by MOshooter, May 14, 2013.

  1. MOshooter

    MOshooter New Member

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    A friend of mine is in a really bad predicament and wants some advise.

    His little sister has serious issues.
    She has been through a second divorce,she is a alcoholic that has lost her two sons because of abuse.

    Well know she has been abusing their parents,she has punched their Mom several times who is 73 years old and tonight while their Dad was driving his daughter she tried to yank the steering wheel out of his hands trying to cause a wreck,she slapped him,hit him in the head with a full beer bottle,and twisted his arm behind his back bringing him to tears he's 72 years old?

    My friend is lost and called me asking my advice,should he call elderly abuse hotline?? Hope it doesn't continue?? He wants his sister to get mental health evaluation,he doesn't want her to go to prison,which she is heading that way on probation for 6 DUIs child abuse and she doesn't even go to her probation appointments??

    What would you do? And what would you advise this person to do about his alcoholic abusive little sister who is 45 years old? Physically abusing her parents?
     
  2. tri70

    tri70 New Member

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    Turn her in and get off the street and off drugs and alcohol. The abuse has to stop, someone could die with a bad hit or accident. You do that out of love, keep loving them and tell them that.
     

  3. HockaLouis

    HockaLouis New Member

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    She commits to getting help or she gets turned in -- sho owns this, not him. He's just the person saving his parents and maybe her life!
     
  4. ScottA

    ScottA FAA licensed bugsmasher Lifetime Supporter

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    I would be calling the police immediately. Then I would talk to your parents about having a restraining order issued asap.
     
  5. KJG67

    KJG67 New Member

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    Most states I believe you can petition someone to be held on a mental health hold for 24-hours if they are a danger to themselves or others. He'll need to fill out the petition with the LEO and attest to what she did. They will be taken to the ER and evaluated by the physician who can certify them and that can be a hold for 72-hours at the very least.

    He should call the local PD non-emergency number to discuss it with them first. However, she's committed battery now, so I don't know what obligation the LEOs have to arrest her.

    Since the parents are unable to defend themselves and either too scared or unwilling to call the police, he needs to take the bull by the horns and defend his parents by calling the PD, and at least getting them to get a restraining order against her.

    Ultimately if she doesn't want to help herself, there's nothing he can do.
     
  6. texaswoodworker

    texaswoodworker New Member

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    Turn her *** in and press charges. That is absolutely unacceptable.
     
  7. Rocky7

    Rocky7 New Member

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    Call the police.

    Then call your "friend" and tell him to never again lay off on you his dirty jobs. That's why he called you; he wants you to do what he finds hard. Weenie.

    I can't stand somebody who abuses or hits a senior. She's a puke. As for her sob story, here's the deal:

    Q: What do you get when you help a horse thief to quite drinking?

    A: A sober horse thief.

    The puke needs to do a lot more than quit drinking, IMO. And your friend needs to grow a pair. That's the way I see it. No offence intended on you, friend.
     
  8. MOshooter

    MOshooter New Member

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    I really appreciate all the input and this is the same advice i've been sending to him.
    I've known his parents and sister since grade school,it kills me to see what has been going on and my friend is really struggling with this. He said his Dad would deny this to keep his daughter out of trouble,even though his Dad called him while all of this was going on,his Dad was driving his daughter to a convention about 70 miles from where they live,because she can't drive.

    I really appreciate your alls input and advice

    Thank you
     
  9. MOshooter

    MOshooter New Member

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    I called elderly hotline abuse for him and sent them all the information about what has been going on.

    Thanks again
     
  10. KJG67

    KJG67 New Member

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    I'm gonna guess she's bipolar. Lithium is a wonder drug.

    Just remind your friend his parents are going to wind up dead, as she obviously has no self-control. Despite what dad want's to do to protect her (God knows why - I'm sure he's of the 'I can fix her' mentality), I think a decent LEO is going to press how they got those bruises on their bodies. Maybe she'll blow up on the cops and get arrested. I'd hate to see her in jail though, as that just one more POS our tax dollars will be supporting, when she likely just needs to get on some meds and therapy, and things will be probably be better.
     
  11. nitestalker

    nitestalker New Member

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    It sounds like a family that has problems with life's decisions. Both the parents and the siblings need professional guidance. :confused:
     
  12. dango

    dango Well-Known Member Lifetime Supporter

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    Zero tolerance on any kind of abuses..!

    Warn.!

    Call..!

    Prosecute..!
    :mad:
     
  13. MisterMcCool

    MisterMcCool Well-Known Member Supporter

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    That is domestic violence.
     
  14. NC1760

    NC1760 New Member

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    She's getting away with it now... Why would (or in her mind should) it stop??
    She doesn't go to probation appointments ???? Easy out then... Go down to the station/courthouse/Sheriff's department and report her and while there get a restraining order ASAP !! Let her know that until she gets straightened out and stays sober for at least 6 months IT WILL REMAIN IN PLACE !! Let her know the choice is simple... either get in rehab and/or incarceration or keep on going and die.... and there is NO SUCH thing as an old alcoholic/drug addict !! SOMEONE with some sense needs to take control and think about all parties concerned here..... and it quite obviously isn't her. At 45 years old it's time for her to grow up and be responsible !!
    Good luck to everyone... and stay close to the old folks. They'll be her target of blame for everything happening.
     
  15. rurak

    rurak New Member

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    I would have no problem tuning my sister up a little bit if she was doing that .... and by tuning up I mean whooping her *** .... she deserves it just saying
     
  16. DrumJunkie

    DrumJunkie New Member

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    It was my sister I'd bust her drunken a$$ then call the law on her for the abuse. The only thing I dislike as must as child abuse is abuse of old people. My mother and me do not get along (long story). Been that way for many years but I wouldn't let something like that happen to her. I can't understand how anyone could want to harm an old person. Especially one that raised you.

    You did the right thing OP. Make sure to see it though to the end.
     
  17. Doc3402

    Doc3402 New Member

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    Call the hotline and turn her in. It will not get better. It will only escalate.
     
  18. PanBaccha

    PanBaccha New Member

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    At 45 and still beating up on her elderly parents, I'd say it is chronic alcoholism, which requires serious intervention, however aggressively done, to put an end to that bullsh*t! If done then lives are saved; if not lives will undoubtedly be lost.
     
  19. trip286

    trip286 New Member

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    I agree, but I would drop the warning. She has committed assault against a loved one. OP, your friend is bring a bit of a pansy by not even being able to make this decision on his own. That may be a bit harsh, but it's the truth.

    I assume (at great risk of making an *** of U and ME) he would call the police if it were someone he doesn't know assaulting his parents. So what makes it any different that it's his sister? Bull spit. He knows she has problems, and she has proven that she's a danger to others, he needs to man the **** up and handle his ****.

    My family and I have a mutual understanding amongst us all. We would bend over backwards for each other, but only to a limit. If you're a danger, commit a crime, or need bail, you're on your own. That may be kinda raw for some people to think of family being that way towards each other, but you know what? We've all paid for our own mistakes, and we've stayed out of jail and serious legal trouble.

    And yeah, for the record, my Mom turned me in for a little lapse of judgment I had when I was 17. This ain't just big talk, the walk has already been walked.

    Tell him to grow a pair and protect his parents from a clear and present danger. Otherwise, he's just in the wrong, and this guy here can think of nothing at all good to say about him if he won't stand up for someone he loves who can't stand up for themselves.
     
  20. Rocky7

    Rocky7 New Member

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    That's par for the course for abuse. Abused women do that a lot. I have told the one or two I've known that they remind me of a friggin' moth and a candle - no matter what is done to shoo them away from it, they are driven to return to the flame.

    No matter. You look after your side of the street and do what is right. None of us can change other people. IMO, every adult is entitled to all the pain they can stand. I just won't be a party to it or wallow in it. Since I began steering that course many years ago, I live better.

    If somebody's asking me for help, I've driven some miles for that purpose and will do what I can. But I take no responsibility for the outcome. Sometimes, we put a hand out to someone who really does want to find some answers and is teachable; sometimes we put a hand out and s/he turns out to be a moth. Either way, it's what we do and don't do that matters. The way it turns out is up to the other person(s) and God.

    Sorry to get a little preachy........but you did raise the topic. :)
     
    Last edited: May 15, 2013