I have discovered, through the years that I can find humor in just about any situation. I think, with the exception of anything happening to me daughter….I c an find a reason to laugh at just about anything. One of the things that make me chuckle most often, and with regularity is when some 350lb mullet in skin-tight 5:11 britches (because they don’t make them big enough to fit his fat ass correctly) starts a conversation at Sportsmans Warehouse, Cabelas, or Bass Pro with: “Tactically Speaking…..blah blah blah”…or “When I was with The Teams…” Let’s face it chubby…the ONLY team you were ever a member of was the “competitive hot dog eating team”, and owning a weapon only makes you about as tactical as a baby’s sippy cup. Because let’s face it…if you don’t have the discipline to force your fat ass away from the buffet table, you damned sure don’t have the discipline for real tactical training and all the hard work it entails. Something else that makes me chuckle is all the bluster about forming paramilitary groups and “training” operators for EOTW or SHTF. I don’t know precisely if it is the ego of the guy thinking he possesses the actual skills and knowledge to actually train the aforementioned operators, or if it is a decidedly unhealthy case of delusional thinking and fantasy. In either case…it makes me chuckle. There is a large group who can’t even define what training is, and how it differs from practice, and how BOTH differ from dirt shooting, or popping caps into paper targets on a square range, and that the same group considers dirt shooting and paper punching with training. “I was in the military”. Super. Good for you. Thank you for your service, and I mean that very sincerely. BUT…unless YOU were actually part of a combat arms team who has had your ass in the grass, and whose responsibilities actually included passing on those skills and knowledge at a high level of competency…your skills at driving a truck, or operating a computer make you about as well qualified to train, let alone lead a paramilitary group as a plumber teaching a retard how do brain surgery. The rules of engagement alone will be different. You will be trying to fight in an unfamiliar arena…whether or not you know the area you are in…you may ONLY know how to fight a specific minded enemy. You may have ZERO experience in urban, suburban, or even rural techniques. No matter what happens…you better expect to have to answer for your actions at some point down the road. You may never have to…but it would be unwise NOT to plan for it. The ability to follow orders of a senior NCO or officer does NOT give you the qualifications, skills, and abilities necessary to formulate plans, and train others to follow you. Being a member of the “best trained, most well supplied” military in the world does NOT give you the ability to effectively grow crops, forage for food, be a hunter of the caliber you would need to be to feed a large group. After all…how many others will be out there hunting to try to feed their groups? How long will it be before you are shooting at one another over what you think is a good hunting area? Will you be able then, to hunt effectively worrying about the very real possibility that another guy who is better than you with a rifle, won’t pop YOU in the skull and take your game? Or maybe a group won’t wait UNTIL you have made a kill, and simply take it from you. Now you will protest that YOU will hunt in a group and security will be provided that way. Okay…let’s look at that for a second. How in the name of hell are you going to keep the group quiet and still enough to make a successful hunt? A better plan will be raising chickens, rabbits, DOGS, pigs, and goats for food. BUT…that goes back to how in the hell are you going to grow enough food for “the group” AND the animals? A skilled farmer would be able to do it…with a tractor and modern equipment…and enough land…and enough people to defend it. BUT…would that skilled farmer, using only animal and manual labor be able to feed the group of defenders too? So, unless you recruit some Amish or Mennonites who are willing to work for the “English” who happen to be armed and that goes against their beliefs….where will you find THAT skill set? Force them to work as slave labor? Well…we’ll store food! How long is that going to last? Do you have the financial resources RIGHT now to fund and finance it? What happens when your stored food runs low, and you have to decide who goes hungry and who eats? What happens when your group rebels, and fighting begins, and all of a sudden the factions break apart, and some of your group are left with nothing? So, let us assume you have got a gaggle of “warriors” together. Now your food is gone. You start to prey on those around you. Even if you last a while and make a few successful raids…and that really means 4:1 ratio of attackers on a defended position with determined defenders. How long will it be until your numbers are narrowed down to the point where you are no longer effective as a “combat unit”? Unless you have the leadership skills, and charisma to unify a whole town or community under your “command”…it just doesn’t make sense. Remember, in a small town or community, local cops will still be there defending the town, and with them will be a large population of people who are working WITH them. A “paramilitary” group of outsiders won’t be welcomed with open arms. In the town where I live we have the sheriff’s office, local PD, and tens of hundreds of corrections and detention officers who are all trained in the use of firearms and know how to work together and take orders. We also have FIVE private prison complexes in addition to the state facilities with hundreds of security personnel. Could even a hundred so-called “warriors” or “fighters” or delusional wannabes have any hope of prevailing against those kinds of numbers? “But we plan to be totally self-sufficient!” Okay…let me know how that works out for you. I have said it before, and I will say it again….unless it is a meteor crashing on the planet and ending us all ala the dinosaurs, I don’t believe in a man-made EOTW event. IF it does happen….the population will be so reduced that MAYBE just MAYBE you will have survived long enough to be one of the last people standing…but I don’t see that as making much sense. So, what will it be? Financial? Doubt it. We still have all the nukes, and we still have the ability to tell the rest of the world to **** all the way off. Bird flu? Maybe. See EOTW above. The most likely SHTF scenario will be a social disruption, lasting a few weeks to a few months, and if you are prepared to bug in, keep a low profile, and repel boarders as part of a family unit, or association of neighbors…you will have the best chance of weathering it out. Still….whatever happens in that scenario, you better damned well better be able to justify everything you did. I know the zombie apocalypse will be a hoot. A vacation. Whatever…but it is really not much more than a masturbatory fantasy for the old “Dungeons and Dragons” fans, and guys who SO badly want to be high speed low drag bad asses, but can’t even manage to be a low speed high drag fat asses. But hey…everyone needs a hobby. Before anyone mentiones it: Yes, I am an *******, and I am well aware of it...but I am a realistic *******...so, flame away. Have a nice day, and thanks for your support.