Stuff my boss says....

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by donthav1, Oct 29, 2012.

  1. donthav1

    donthav1 Active Member

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    we all know some of our employers are a bit..uh....odd sometimes. i figured i'd try & start a thread about some of the stuff your boss says that just makes you go WTF???

    for example, what i heard the other day: "when you get to that house, try to get the most done first." :confused:

    our part time guy calls to get directions to the job site, conversation goes like this:

    bob: "where are you guys at?"
    boss: "across the street from the van"

    let's here some of yours
     
  2. silverado113

    silverado113 New Member

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    Not personal experience from me but a friend of mine once heard, "sorry I screwed your wife" :eek:
     

  3. mountainman13

    mountainman13 New Member

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    My phone rings and I hear "your phone is leaking".
     
  4. vincent

    vincent New Member

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    Since I work for myself, I'm my own boss...

    Everything my boss says is witty, charming and intelligent...:p
     
  5. Wiebelhaus

    Wiebelhaus New Member

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    Honestly I don't have anything nice to say so, you know what they say about that.

    So on that note....I'll just leave this here [​IMG]
     
  6. USEBOTHHANDS

    USEBOTHHANDS New Member

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    i can agree with this statement, seein as i am my own boss also.

    PLUS, my boss is a DAMN GOOD-LOOKIN S.O.B! :D
     
  7. vincent

    vincent New Member

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    Brown noser!!! :p

    On second thought, maybe I'll try suckin' up to myself...I'm waaay overdue for a raise...;)

    [ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcwyOaYyu7Y[/ame]
     
  8. mountainman13

    mountainman13 New Member

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    Whoa,wait,what?...so that explains how you achieved such greatness. Lmfao
     
  9. vincent

    vincent New Member

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    Well played sir, your clever editing did not go unnoticed...:D you just made the list and my vengeance will come swiftly...or when I get around to it, whichever comes first...:p


    And I'm not nearly as great as I think I am....








    ...because I tried... I could never reach...:eek:
     
  10. robocop10mm

    robocop10mm Lifetime Supporting Member Lifetime Supporter

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    I had a Lieutenant a long tiime ago that overheard an officer's radio transmission "95 one time, in route to Brack" meaning a person in custody, in route to the local trauma center. His reply was "Ahhh, music to my ears".
     
  11. Mosin

    Mosin Well-Known Member

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    I'm a sailor, my bosses comments can't be posted on a public forum... :-(
     
  12. mountainman13

    mountainman13 New Member

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    Lmfao.....too funny.
     
  13. trip286

    trip286 New Member

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    Boss: guess how I contaminated this water sample with fecalform bacteria...

    Me: no.
     
  14. -06

    -06 New Member

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    My customers are my boss-at least if they pay me. We move houses/buildings/etc. and as we approached an intersection the patrolman escort asked me how I was going to make a left turn onto the lot--I smiled and said " Am going to turn my steering wheel to the left". His bud belly laughed but he failed to see the humor and I got that --I'll be looking for you stare.
    In trying to get the men to walk faster I often comment--"wait and let me set up the transit to site you and see if you are moving". Then there is "Can't never can and won't never will".
     
  15. JD1969

    JD1969 New Member

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    Man, where to start. I think my boss is getting senile, he says and does some really wacky things. I'll update this when he says something weird, it won't take long.
     
  16. partdeux

    partdeux Well-Known Member

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    I don't even know where to begin...
     
  17. tri70

    tri70 New Member

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    Hurry up my reports!

    Never mind all that other stuff I do that actually makes money and takes care of the customer! :rolleyes:
     
  18. JD1969

    JD1969 New Member

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    Every day on my way home he calls and asks if I unplugged everything and I mean EVERYTHING, even the radio has to be unplugged.
     
  19. marlin-owner

    marlin-owner New Member

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    my boss had me moving steel around and in the prossess i managed to tear a chunk of skin along with my nail completely off... i called him and he just said get into the first aid kit and take the rest of the day, so i did. the next day on our way to general dynamics he asked me to show him my finger. to my suprise he laughed at me. his response was, boy dont talk to me about finger pain. he flashed what was left of his pointer finger at me saying i tore this off on the shop door and i burned it with hot metal ripped my shirt, tied up my finger, threw the nub in the trash and kept working... holy **** is what i was thinking the rest of the day...
     
  20. lbwar15

    lbwar15 New Member

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    The thing I have noticed especially working on boats is most of the time they are full of ****. I remember when I first started working in the oil field. My capt would say "when I was a hand I could throw a rope 40 feet in to the wind and still hit the bit." "I did this I did that" meet a guy a week later that was his capt. He starts telling me all these stories about my capt. "Back when he was my hand he couldn't hold a rope much less throw it, sorry *** hand he was". All I could do was lol.