New Words for 2009

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by Jo da Plumbr, Sep 8, 2009.

  1. Jo da Plumbr

    Jo da Plumbr New Member

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    New Words for 2009


    * SWAMP-DONKEY

    A deeply unattractive person.

    * TESTICULATING.
    Waving your arms around and talking bollocks.

    * BLAMESTORMING.
    Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a
    project failed, and who was responsible.

    * SEAGULL MANAGER.
    A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and
    Then leaves.

    * SALMON DAY.
    The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get
    screwed and die.

    * CUBE FARM.
    An office filled with cubicles.

    * PRAIRIE DOGGING.
    When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and
    people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. (This also
    applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)

    * SINBAD.
    Single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate.

    * AEROPLANE BLONDE.
    One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.

    * PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
    The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it
    to work again.

    * AUSSIE KISS.
    Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.

    * OH - NO SECOND.
    That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just
    made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all').

    * GREYHOUND.
    A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.

    * JOHNNY-NO-STARS.
    A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who
    works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges
    displaying stars that staff at fast-food rest au rants often wear to show
    their level of training.

    * MILLENNIUM DOMES.
    The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from
    the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing.

    * MONKEY BATH .
    A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: 'Oo! Oo! Oo!
    Aa! Aa! Aa!'.

    * MYSTERY BUS.
    The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the
    toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so
    the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.

    * MYSTERY TAXI.
    The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake
    up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in your
    bed instead.

    * BEER COAT.
    The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise
    At 3:00am .

    * BEER COMPASS.
    The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze
    cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live, how
    you got here, and where you've come from.

    * BREAKING THE SEAL.
    Your first pee in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After
    breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be
    required every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night.

    * TART FUEL.
    Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women.

    * TRAMP STAMP
    Tattoo on a female

    * PICASSO BUM.
    A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's
    got 4 buttocks


    * SALAD DODGER.
    An excellent phrase for an overweight person.
     
  2. suprdave

    suprdave New Member

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    Nice work. Very familiar with swamp donkeys. Before I was married, I met a few...;)
     

  3. Jo da Plumbr

    Jo da Plumbr New Member

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    Did they arrive in the mystery taxi?:eek:
     
  4. Dillinger

    Dillinger New Member

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    LOL - Salad Dodger.... :D

    That's funny right there...

    JD
     
  5. meek

    meek New Member

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    I'm a Johhny Nostar. I'm dating a swamp donkey w a picasso bum and tramp stamp. Met her in a cube farm, asked for an aussie kiss, while percussive maintincening the copy machine. Took her out for tart fuel, she was wearing a grey hound, and turns out they were millenium domes, waited for the Mystery Taxi, that never showed, forcing an oh no second. Took a monkey bath and went to bed early, got a salmon day tomorrow with a seagull manager. I hope there are sinbad's about but will settle for an airplane blonde. I know it'll end up a blamestorm, but that just an excuse to start testiculating.
     
  6. Jo da Plumbr

    Jo da Plumbr New Member

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    You get extra credit for that sir.

    :D:D:D
     
  7. IGETEVEN

    IGETEVEN New Member

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    Thanks Jo! Learned some new words today! :D

    Jack
     
  8. suprdave

    suprdave New Member

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    Yep. I hated that damn thing...
     
  9. bkt

    bkt New Member

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    Those are great! (But some of them have been around a few years.)
     
  10. zhuk

    zhuk New Member

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    Now that's gold Jo. I'm stealing that if you don't mind...I think it's gonna get quite a workout :D



    Ha, good one! Not to be confused with the venerable 'Glasgow Kiss' ie a swift headbutt :p