I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist. MSDS-MEN Hazardous Materials Information Sheet : MEN Element: Men Symbol: BS Discoverer: Should be shot Atomic Mass: 70 kg (without Ego), 1000 kg (Ego included) Occurrences: Found just about anywhere women are. Physical Properties: • Surface covered in hairy coat • Displays signs of spineless puppy dog when properly whipped by a experienced woman. • Hardens very easily, but softens at nothing. • Sweet only when necessary, otherwise generally very bitter. • Found in only one state : Horny • Yields to just about anything with open legs. Chemical Properties: • Has a great affinity for bimbos and remote controls. • High Grade specimens spend great quantities of expensive substances. • Inability to think with more than one organ at a time. • Attracted to just about anything, but sticks to nothing. • Most powerful self-esteem reducing agent known to woman. Common Uses: • Has not yet been discovered. • Some usefulness has been found when dealing with household appliances, but usefulness is extremely limited. • Occasionally useful in bedroom, but only when given explicit instructions. Tests: • Becomes extremely competitive when grouped with several other specimens. • Pure specimen becomes an a**h*** when saturated with alcohol. Hazards: • It is extremely difficult to keep one of these. A trained expert can resort to various tricks if necessary. • It is illegal to posses more than one, but why would anyone want even the one they have?