loved ones lost

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by primer1, Aug 1, 2013.

  1. primer1

    primer1 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    This is a remembrance thread, designed to honor anyone you've lost in your life. Type away with stories, descriptions of character, etc. This can be funny, boring, exciting, sad, however you want to honor the dead.

    Death is a part of life, and coping can be hard for some people. Talking or typing will certainly help with coping, whether it was yesterday or twenty years ago.

    I'll start with my grandfather, not my real gf, but he was close to me nonetheless. He had a lawnmower that didn't start one day, and he had been seeing red jimmy a squirrel around it. He popped the hood, and said little Jim stripped all the wiring on the mower. All of it. Ever since, he had an extreme hatred for the squirrels.

    Ever since, he shot one every chance he could get, including through the window screens. My grandma threw a fit but it did not stop him. It got to the point he would buy window screen by the roll. Looking at that little .410 single shot will always remind me of him repairing the screen while my grandma b!?@%$d.
     
  2. DrFootball

    DrFootball disappointed & disgusted, But DETERMINED... Lifetime Supporter

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    I guess it's difficult to accept loss for many. I know it was always hard for me. I lost my Dad At a rough time in my life, going through a divorce, and trying to finish an education while still serving in the reserves. He survived Korea, Vietnam, and a Bunch of Heart Attacks to leave us too soon at 59. I was 27. He's the reason I did many things back then and still dedicate my time to helping others now.
     

  3. TekGreg

    TekGreg Lifetime Supporting Member Lifetime Supporter

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    My Dad died of three strokes in a row on Christmas Day when I was five years old, and my mother couldn't stand to live in the same house, so we moved. There was a neighbor couple who had never been able to have children, but I immediately took to the husband, nicknamed "Tiny." Tiny had a sixth-grade education and worked at a major timber mill. He drove a pickup daily and owned a military truck with a Rock Crusher transmission and rear end.

    I was a book-educated intellectual idiot when I met Tiny. He taught me to drive,and it was that big military truck I learned in! When I asked him why such a big truck for my first vehicle, he said, "Do you think after learning to drive this you'll have any problem driving any other vehicle?" He was right - nothing with wheels ever bested me. He taught me to shoot, much to the chagrin of my mother. Without Tiny, I never would have touched a firearm before 18. He taught me to hunt, build buildings, grow vegetables, re-roof STEEP roofs on houses and handle chain saws. I always thought that somehow my Dad had sent Tiny to me so I wouldn't just be a big geek with no common sense. Whatever the reason, I will always credit Tiny with making me a whole person, and I will never forget him laughing his butt off every time I did something stupid and failing. He meant the World to me and emphasized how important a real man is in a boy's life while growing up.
     
  4. shadecorp

    shadecorp Active Member Supporter

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    When you reach my age,
    so many have passed.
    My Father, a WWI Vet. died when I was young.
    My fondest memories, when to took me to work with Him, He worked in the oil fields.
    My Mom,
    I still feel very bad about not being a better son. or a good son.
    My Brother, served in the AAF at the end of WWII.
    My first ex-wife.
    So many Relatives.
    So many Friends.
    Some co-workers.
    One Great Friend, Don.
    Rode motorcycles together,
    Raced motorcycles together.
    Went Shootin and hunting together.
    He moved to Los Banos,
    we went duck hunting.
    yep, when you get this old,
    oh well.
     
    Last edited: Aug 2, 2013
  5. Steel_Talon

    Steel_Talon New Member

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    :( I Hurt.....

    [ame="http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmVAWKfJ4Go"]http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmVAWKfJ4Go[/ame]
     
  6. eatmydust

    eatmydust New Member

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    At 53 y.o., I am blessed beyond all reason, to still have my mother and my father alive and well. My heart felt condolences to all here who have lost a parent or parents!

    Let me tell you a true love story.

    My late mother-in-law, Barbara G. Klair, the most selfless person I have ever met, died at age 70, on July 13, 2011. In the year 2000, her mother was dying of old age at nearly 98 years old, and her family farm was being sold, against her wishes, due to legal issues and the fact that her older brothers wanted to cash in.

    During this most tumultuous and stressful part of her life, she had a clause written into the land sale contract that she would retain the living rights to allow 2 family members to hunt deer on this prime real estate.

    None of her biological children or my f-I-l hunted. I alone was the fortunate recipient of her thoughtfulness, for which I will forever be thankful!

    Thank you & God bless you, Mom Klair.

    This is only a minute example of her selflessness. She was constantly taking in stray kids & critters. Each of you reading this would have been loved by her and treated like family. She is truly missed by so many more than just those her were blessed to be her "family".
     
  7. winds-of-change

    winds-of-change The Balota's Staff Member

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    My Mom. Nothing in my life will ever be worse than burying my Mom.
     
  8. DrFootball

    DrFootball disappointed & disgusted, But DETERMINED... Lifetime Supporter

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    Except for a parent buying a child...I've been a part to that as well
     
  9. primer1

    primer1 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    My grandpa's widow has buried four. She has three left.
     
  10. Axxe55

    Axxe55 The Apocalypse Is Coming.....

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    i have lost many loved ones as well, many of them family. one i have to remember is friend of mine named Dale. Dale was a happy, go-lucky kind of fellow and would bring a smile to your face no matter how bad you felt. Dale liked to drink a bit from time to time, and many a morning he would show up for work just a little hungover, but would still be able to smile and make you smile. he had a funny sense of humor and was always telling funny punchlines from funny movies or shows. Dale had not long become a father to a beautiful baby girl. he was killed in a car wreck on a sunday afternoon, and had just left my house and was on his way home. he was killed about a mile from where i live. i didn't find out until monday evening when two of the guys i use to work with came by and told me. i was at a loss for words and didn't believe it at first. the realization hit me when i saw his GF and his daughter after the funeral, and it struck me, that she would never really know how great a person her father was.

    i go by where he was killed from time to time and i see that little white wooden cross beside the hiway. there is no name or date on it, but i know who it's for. i loved Dale like he was family, and he was a very dear friend. RIP Dale. i miss ya little buddy. :(
     
  11. TekGreg

    TekGreg Lifetime Supporting Member Lifetime Supporter

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    I'd like to make a note for all men and women who have experienced the personal Hell of losing an unborn child. Society doesn't recognize miscarriage because there is no grave nor ceremony, but it can be devastating. It is a loss unto its own, and no one deserves it.
     
  12. DrFootball

    DrFootball disappointed & disgusted, But DETERMINED... Lifetime Supporter

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    Yup,..lost a Brother I never knew. He'd be 49 now...
     
  13. donthav1

    donthav1 Active Member

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    I lost my dad 13 years ago, 2 weeks ago it would've been to the day. I was 19 at the time, dad was 39. I'm damn near as old as he ever got & at times it is a startling, heavy feeling. The pain is less & less as the years go by, but the hurt never goes away. Some days it comes back with a fury & not gonna lie, I will cry like a little girl.

    He was one helluva shot with a handgun, better than I've ever been or probably will be. He was a true biker; he never met a motorcycle he didn't like, whether Japanese, American, or European. The way some people look at shelter animals was the way he looked at bikes chained to a tree, in the rain, with a "for sale" sign on them. He felt he needed to show them some love & give 'em a good home. He used to drag race bikes as a hobby, fastest one & favorite of his started life as a 1978 KZ1000 & eventually was tweaked & tuned to run a 1/4 mile at 9.50 & 150 mph....keep in mind this was almost 25 years ago, it took a lot of work to get a bike running that fast back then, nevermind an old out of date air-cooled bike. He was the fastest guy at the track at the time & when the run was over he acted like he went down the street for ice cream, no big deal.

    It wasn't until I got older, years after his passing, that I really started to appreciate the things he did & the way he handled himself afterwards. truly amazing at times.
     
  14. deadsp0t

    deadsp0t New Member

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    I've lost friends, many in fact.. All my grandparents and great grand parents, I carried all the latter.. I've also lost a sister, she 17, me 18.. That was very difficult.. The hardest.. My brother, 3 years this sept..



    image-4030251590.jpg

    The tattoo in the center is my mark for him, my crest for my fathers parents..

    Whenever these passings trouble me.. The words..
    "Let us mourn those we've lost, although we miss them for selfish reasons"
    Always pull me through..
     
  15. DrFootball

    DrFootball disappointed & disgusted, But DETERMINED... Lifetime Supporter

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    We all have it in common. It's good to get the memories out,..both good and bad. Retain the good so you always have those times thinking fondly of them and remember they are at peace and out of whatever pain they had...
     
  16. winds-of-change

    winds-of-change The Balota's Staff Member

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    My lovely Eric. He was a true friend. I still miss him and he's still on the cover of my cellphone. I'll be meeting with his family Friday to celebrate his birthday.

    [​IMG]
     
  17. DrFootball

    DrFootball disappointed & disgusted, But DETERMINED... Lifetime Supporter

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    Co Workers are like family too!
     
  18. DrumJunkie

    DrumJunkie New Member

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    I've lost many over the years. Friends, family, co workers. I was always sad but tried to remember their life rather than morn their death. That worked pretty well until my Dad died. They say a man comes to terms with his own mortality when he watches his father pass. I'm not all that sure that was the case for me at least on a conscious level. But I spent a good while wondering how the world looked the same around me when it obviously was not.

    My Dad was my best friend growing up. No master how bad I got with my childish dumbassery he was always there to pick me up and dust me off. He was a hard nosed hard drinking man for many years.His sisters say to this day that he was never the same after the two wars (WWII & Korea). Still the center of attention and the life if the party but there was a distance in his eyes they noticed that was not there when the 17 year old boy shipped off. He loved the Army though and wanted to stay but my mother wanted him home and that was that.... He went home.
    I only knew the man that taught me to play baseball, play the drums, and be there first when I did something stupid so he could smack me in the back of the head and advise me how to make it right. He drove in my head at every opportunity that a man only has one thing in this world that shows his worth. And that is your word. If your word does not hold weight then you are useless and that was that. So manke damn sure you always make sure your words was as good as gospel. It didn't matter what you did to fold your money. What mattered was you did it the best you could. And you never fail until you stop trying.

    Tell me though....WHAT KIND OF MAN HAS A STROKE CALLS A CAB?!?!?!? He didn't want the hoopla of an ambulance. And he had to drag himself into the cab. Would not let anyone help him. I get a call fromt he hospital and fly down there. He says "Sorry boy, I knew you where working and didn't want to bother you. W H A T ?!?!?!:eek: It was a good thing he was in the hospital then cause I wanted to kill him!!

    The man could do any type of mathematics in his head. He as a land surveyer and just said i twas easier tan tryingot keep up wo tha calculator. Anyway back-when in the early 70's there wasn't a lot of those things around.:rolleyes:\

    I miss him to this day. Still don't know if I have come to terms with my mortality. I do hope we meet up when I reach the clearing at the end of my path though. He owes me a beer.;)
     
  19. winds-of-change

    winds-of-change The Balota's Staff Member

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    We had a lot of adventures outside of work, too. He was my son from another mother and father. And his parents like me, too. His Mom said, "It takes three parents to deal with Eric." Hahahaha.......
     
  20. trip286

    trip286 New Member

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    I actually wrote this for the "It blows my mind" thread (on a college course for speaking to black men), but after rambling on a bit, I realized it fits much better here...



    I learned to understand... Well, I wouldn't call it ebonics. Street talk either. Or ghetto speak...
    I was running a concrete finishing crew when I was just a young little turd. Not even old enough to drive, not by a long shot. The way those old black men spoke would be a language of it's own. And by old, I mean, "checked out a nursing home with the wife last Saturday" kinda old. That was a regular conversation on my crew.

    One of my "heroes" was a man named Robert, AKA, Bear. Was nicknamed Bear because he just looked like one.

    Spent many years in Parchman in unit 29 (death row), where he did eventually escape execution after nearly 20 years on the grounds of a technicality. When I asked him, "D'you kill dat man? In cold blood like dey sez you did?", he said, "Daim rat ah's did. Ah beat'eem wit da shovel till he stopt moovin. Den ah hiteem suh'mo." I never did find out what he'd done to deserve it, but I gathered, he probably didn't really deserve it...

    While in Parchman, working on a chain gang, guards sicced a dog on him. He beat it to death with a shovel too, then went back to working like nothing had happened. Spent two months in the hole. This was related to me by a man I hired on the sole fact that he did time with Bear, and came highly recommended by him.

    Bear was a constant figure in my life. He came to the hospital when I was born, and I still have the picture floating around somewhere of him holding me at only a few minutes old. Pulled my first tooth and gave me instructions in all seriousness that I was to go straight home, tell my mom, and put it under my pillow. Couldn't go to work when I had throat surgery at 5 years old, because he had to be there at the hospital every moment he could, waiting for me to get out and go home, wringing his hands and worrying. Came to every birthday party, and was the only black man there, and the only one my dog would tolerate (my dog was a racist bastard, after a black man chased my mom with a stick). He'd meet me after school at the shop on rain days where I'd help him work on whatever needed doing (usually cleaning). He took me fishing when my dad wouldn't, and cried like a baby when my parents split and I told him I'd be moving away with my mom, and just could not be consoled until I promised him over and over that I'd be coming back to visit (it was soon after that when I started spending the summers working for my dad and got put in charge of running Bear's crew)

    He was a Marine vet too, back before his prison days. Wrote me a letter in boot camp and told me he was coming to my graduation ceremony, but he didn't make it. One day on the job, he'd simply announced that, "I'm through. No more for this old (N-word). Tell Delilah I love her." laid down like he was going to take a nap, and died with his cigar still clamped between his teeth. 94 years old. Cause of death was listed as "natural causes". No heart attack, stroke, cancer, anything. He'd just had enough. Coroner said he was actually in surprisingly good condition, other than some old and obvious injuries and arthritis, but everyone already knew that. We were starting to think he'd just live forever.

    I still couldn't quite understand everything he said, and it took nearly half my platoon to decipher his letter.