Joke Forum?

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by nwrednk, Sep 11, 2010.


  1. primer1

    primer1 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    -- ^^ wonders if liking that will result in being placed on 'the watchlist' --
     
  2. G66enigma

    G66enigma Well-Known Member Supporter

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    And unintended shots striking nearby folks plummet down to zero. (Except in NYC, where it's all but certain, given so many millions of them milling about in the "background.")

    Lemonade from lemons.

    :p
     
  3. G66enigma

    G66enigma Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Och!, laddie. Still and all, easier than Gaelic.
     
  4. TimKS

    TimKS Well-Known Member Lifetime Supporter

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    Never mind, belonging to this forum, you're already on it. :eek: :D
     
  5. ellis36

    ellis36 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a chair. She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration.

    'What troubles you, Sister?' asked the Mother Superior.'I thought this was the day you spent with your family.'
    "It was,' sighed the Sister. 'And I went to play golf with my brother. You know I was quite a talented golfer before I devoted my life to Christ.'
    'I seem to recall that,' the Mother Superior agreed. 'So I take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?'
    'Far from it,' snorted the Sister. 'In fact, I even took the Lord's name in vain today!'
    Goodness, Sister!' gasped the Mother Superior, astonished. 'You must tell me all about it!'
    'Well, we were on the fifth tee...and this hole is a monster, Mother Superior! 540 yard Par 5, with a nasty dog leg left and a hidden Green... and I hit the drive of my life. I creamed it. The sweetest swing I ever made. And it's flying straight and true, right along the line I wanted... and it hits a bird in mid-flight!'
    Oh my!' commiserated the Mother. 'How unfortunate! But surely that didn't make you blaspheme, Sister!'
    'No, that wasn't it,' admitted Sister. 'While I was still trying to fathom what had happened, this squirrel runs out of the woods, grabs my ball and runs off down the fairway!'
    'Oh, that would have made me blaspheme!' sympathized the Mother
    'But I didn't, Mother!' sobbed the Sister. 'And I was so proud of myself! And while I was pondering whether this was a sign from God, this hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs the squirrel and flies off, with my ball still clutched in his paws!'
    'So that's when you cursed,' said the Mother with a knowing smile.
    'Nope, that wasn't it either,' cried the Sister, anguished, 'because as the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel started struggling, and the hawk dropped him right there on the green, and the ball popped out of his paws and rolled to about 18 inches from the cup!'

    Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her chest, fixed on the Sister with a baleful stare and said...'You missed the f****** putt, didn't you!
     
  6. Mister Dave

    Mister Dave Well-Known Member

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  7. Capacitor

    Capacitor Active Member

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    I remember when it was four digits, 1085. Then the prefix started 967-1085. It was a party line.
     
    winds-of-change likes this.
  8. Mister Dave

    Mister Dave Well-Known Member

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    Yep. Every once in a while you'd pick up the phone and people were on it talking.
     
  9. CMAB2SA

    CMAB2SA Well-Known Member

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    Last edited: Oct 25, 2020
    AZdave and schnuffleupagus like this.
  10. schnuffleupagus

    schnuffleupagus Well-Known Member

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  11. schnuffleupagus

    schnuffleupagus Well-Known Member

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    Party line at grammas was 2 short and 1 long
     
    winds-of-change and TimKS like this.
  12. ellis36

    ellis36 Well-Known Member Supporter

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  13. TimKS

    TimKS Well-Known Member Lifetime Supporter

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    What..... were we neighbors? :D Our three digit number was a long & two shorts....299. :D (1952'ish.)
     
    Rifling82 likes this.
  14. G66enigma

    G66enigma Well-Known Member Supporter

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    I just love "momma" jokes.


    Had one similar to that one, growing up: "The dam fish" (fish from the dam / pass the flippin' potatoes).
     
    ellis36 likes this.
  15. Capacitor

    Capacitor Active Member

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    Okay that was over my head!
     
  16. JTJ

    JTJ Well-Known Member Supporter

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    I remember letter prefixes on phone numbers. Ours was AX.
     
    winds-of-change likes this.