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Discussion in 'The Club House' started by nwrednk, Sep 11, 2010.
SOCIAL DISTANCING BAPTISM.
You have to use the stuff you put in the dishwasher. :Eyeroll:
I have all the respect for the Doctors, Nurses and First Responders who work tireless hours to take care if the sick. And the COVID 19 patients. It is difficult and taking a toll on them.
A Nurse got off work at the Hospital after working a grueling 16 hours.
She rushed into the Bank on her way home to make a Deposit.
She went to the Teller, pulled our her Money and Her Deposit Slip and attempted to fill it out. The Teller was utterly appalled as the Nurse pulled a Rectal Thermometer out of her purse and began to try to fill in the Deposit Slip with it. Suddenly seeing what she had in her hand that she was trying to fill out the Deposit Slip with. She stated to the Teller who was watching her. D*** you won't believe it! But some Arsss Hole has stolen my Pen!
" Dad Jokes "
I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker. But when I got home, all the signs were there.
A German man walks up to the immigration desk at Warsaw airport. The immigration officer asks: “Occupation?” The German replies: “No, just a holiday.”
A Briton walks up to the immigration counter at the Sydney Airport. The officer asks, “Do you have any felony convictions?” The Briton replies, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that was still a requirement.”
Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes. They had no fire, so they threw one of the cigarettes overboard, and the entire boat became a cigarette lighter.
The creator of the knock knock joke should get a Nobel prize.
A Man walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder. The bartender says “What an interesting pet, whats his name?”
“Tiny” the man replies.
“What an odd name, why do you call him Tiny?” “Because…He’s my newt.”
Have you ever tried to eat a clock? Its very time consuming.
A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there’s a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there’s a large limo line at the rental office, but he’s patient and gets the job done.
Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there’s no punchline.