Joke Forum?

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by nwrednk, Sep 11, 2010.

  1. Sniper03

    Sniper03 Supporting Member Supporter

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    Maser
    THAT WAS GREAT! Thanks for the great humor! I really enjoyed it!:p

    03
     
  2. tac foley

    tac foley Well-Known Member

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    I'm sure some of you have seen this but it makes me smile.

    CALIFORNIA
    • The Governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor's dog, then bites the Governor.
    • The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie "Bambi" and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.
    • He calls animal control. Animal Control captures the coyote and bills the state $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it.
    • He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases.
    • The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged.
    • The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals.
    • The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a "coyote awareness program" for residents of the area.
    • The State Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.
    • The Governor's security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training for the nature of coyotes.
    • PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a $5 million suit against the state.

    TEXAS
    • The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks his dog.
    • The Governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent $.50 on a .45 ACP hollow point cartridge.
    • The buzzards eat the dead coyote.

    And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.

    Thanks to Krazeehorse from SIGforum.
     
    Shopfox, Sniper03, AZdave and 7 others like this.

  3. Caveman Jim

    Caveman Jim Well-Known Member Supporter

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    HAHAHAHA, I’m not falling for the one....














    Again!!!
     
  4. Caveman Jim

    Caveman Jim Well-Known Member Supporter

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    My daughter is reliving her childhood with her daughter who just turned 18 months... LOL!!
     
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  5. Mister Dave

    Mister Dave Well-Known Member

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    Fun stuff no doubt. I hear from friends that boys are the worst in their "terrible twos".
     
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  6. Maser

    Maser Well-Known Member

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    I feel like I'm probably on some FBI watch list now because I had to manually type in the name of that song to find it. :rolleyes:
     
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  7. primer1

    primer1 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Maybe you already were on the list





     
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  8. Maser

    Maser Well-Known Member

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    How about some clean kid friendly jokes?

    Q: What is the laziest part of a car?
    A: The wheels because they're always tired.

    Q: Why can't a nose be 12 inches long?
    A: It would be a foot instead.

    Q: Why do we go to bed everynight?
    A: Because the bed won't go to us.

    Q: What kinda car does Mickey Mouse's wife drive?
    A: A Minnie van.

    Q: What gets wetter the more it dries?
    A: A towel.

    Q: What type of music are balloons afraid of?
    A: Pop music.

    Q: Why are pirates such good singers?
    A: They hit the high Cs.

    Knock-knock
    Who's there?
    Ash.
    Ash who?
    Bless you.

    Knock-knock
    Who's there?
    Woo
    Woo who?
    No need to get so excited over a joke.
     
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  9. c3shooter

    c3shooter Administrator Staff Member Admin Moderator Lifetime Supporter

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    Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors?


    If it had 4 doors, it would be a chicken sedan......
     
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  10. tac foley

    tac foley Well-Known Member

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    Thass terble.

    What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?





    A stick.
     
  11. JTJ

    JTJ Well-Known Member Supporter

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    When she is really frustrated gently remind her she was the same way.:D
     
  12. W.T. Sherman

    W.T. Sherman Well-Known Member

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    Last edited: Dec 12, 2019
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  13. W.T. Sherman

    W.T. Sherman Well-Known Member

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    Santa is having a mid-life crisis. kinda puts a different light on HO-HO-HO[​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Dec 12, 2019
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  14. Mister Dave

    Mister Dave Well-Known Member

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