In response to "some of us were born in 1956"

Discussion in 'Legal and Activism' started by dermamorphic, Feb 4, 2013.

  1. dermamorphic

    dermamorphic New Member

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    I can't profess to know or understand an individuals reasoning when it comes to how pop culture influences their grammar, demeanor, clothing, or the people chosen to be a role model. I do however understand that the role parents play for their children greatly influences the adults they will one day become (provided they make it).

    Before placing the burden of blame and our futures on the shoulders of children, lets take a look at their parents and then grandparents for their failures to instill the fundamentals needed to become productive members of society. Then we should consider the environment that an individual grows up in, and I mean the big picture not just the immediate locations.

    My point, if it hasn't been deciphered, is that blame is easy to assign. Don't use video games and tv as a babysitter. Pay attention to the trends of music and culture, and challenge them to consider what the meanings (if any) or values (or lack of) are being portrayed. Instead of just saying no ask them why. Understanding how we effect our children and teach them to adapt instead of follow is how change becomes meaningful.

    Trying to make something go away because you won't take responsibility is cowardice.
     
  2. CaseyChadwell

    CaseyChadwell New Member

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    I was born in 1984. I have two beautiful boys aged 12 & 6. I work 2 jobs, upwards of 80 hours a week, more If you count drive time. I listen to country music, I don't have cable at my house, let alone video game consoles. I served my country, I wear Levi jeans and button up shirts, I wear a cowboy hat and boots, I help people that need it and deserve it and I am just as proud to be an American today as I was on September 11 2001. I think AR may be generalizing too much.

    As to this threads op, I agree in the fact that parents need to raise their children better. My sister is a fine example of parenting gone wrong...drugs and the "night life" have a hold on her while her child is in foster care. Parents are the main influence of their children's lives. A child can only learn from what they are taught, and if they aren't being taught anything, they will learn from the actions of their parents.

    I am not trying to pat myself on the back, but I just wanted ar to know that not all people in my generation are worthless ass hanging out of pants, criminal glorifying disrespectful people. I think I am more than responsible enough to own firearms and I have proven that over my 28 years as an American and a productive member of society.
     

  3. locutus

    locutus Well-Known Member Supporter

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    If you read Dr. Spock's book and took it seriously, YOU are the problem, not the children that you failed to raise properly.
     
  4. winds-of-change

    winds-of-change The Balota's Staff Member

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    Love your children. Treat them fairly and with respect. Understand that they are children and don't have the thought processes of an adult. Be tolerant and patient in teaching them. Make raising them a priority in your life. Know that they are only little once and someday you will have your life back after they area grown and gone. Make them feel important to you and in your family. Teach them through word and example. Never make them feel like they are a pain in the ass to you and if you do wrong them in some way, don't be afraid to apologize. I'm not saying 'let them run the show' but they are important members of the family just as you are. I was strict with my children but I also loved them and respected them and they knew it. Even if their personal crises seem minor and insignificant to you, it is a big issue to them at that point in their life. Yes, it seems stupid that they are upset because their 'best friend' has been hanging around with someone else lately. But to them it is the end of the world and they should not be belittled for their feelings. Help them see the bigger picture. You can spoil a child with 'things' but you can't spoil a child with love.
     
    Last edited: Feb 4, 2013
  5. locutus

    locutus Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Well said!:)
     
  6. 25-5

    25-5 New Member

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    Do not discount the peer group. Particularly if they go away to college. The values we taught made for fine adults. No problems with drugs etc. But, the great education they received and their peers helped them to be more liberal than the dad.
     
  7. Axxe55

    Axxe55 The Apocalypse Is Coming.....

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    growing up, and i come from a different generation, (born in 1963) so my heroes were my father and my grandfather. my father raised us strictly and with discipline when we deserved it. he taught us values, the difference between right and wrong and that a person should face consquences for their actions. he taught us to own up to our mistakes and that people will respect you for doing so. he taught us to try and always do the right thing, even if ding the right thing was the harder choice.

    my grandfather passed away when i was eleven. i still miss him even today, but the thing i miss the most is the things he wasn't able to pass down to me by passing when i was so young. oh, the things that man could have taught me. my father just turned seventy, and though my grandfather is gone, i try and enjoy the time i get with father now, and still try to learn from him. and i will say this, he and i have moved into a different type of relationship, as he now treats me more as adult and as an equal rather than a son. for him to treat me as he does now, is truly a special feeling, because i owe who i am as an adult to him and my grandfather.

    my brother was brought up the same way and now is passing those same values to his own daughters. he works hard and provides a good home for his family. he owns his own business and worked very hard to make it grow. he spends alot of time with his wife and daughters, but he never spoils them. they are very well behaved and very smart. and even thought i am a year older than him, i have a huge amount of respect for what my brother has accomplished and the person he is.

    children are product of their environment. if left unchecked and to their own, with no guidance, no limits and no instruction, and no morals, they will many times choose the easier ways of life to get by. children need love, guidance and discipline. they need to know that there are consquences for their actions when they do wrong. parents need to nurture and teach as well as love their children. children are our most precious resource that is dependent upon what parents instill in them today. who they become tomorrow depends on what they are taught to value today.
     
  8. kytowboater

    kytowboater Active Member

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    Guess I fall into old dudes description. I'm 24 so I must be worthless......

    Douchebag.
     
  9. JTJ

    JTJ Well-Known Member Supporter

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    I have an 18 year old grandson that graduated from high school with honors and is now in college. He is also an Eagle Scout. Our kid turned out OK. The idea that every one of a certain age is worthless is ridiculous.
     
  10. kytowboater

    kytowboater Active Member

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    Yep. Married, have child, three vehicles, our own place about to buy a house. Nice things, only debt is one car payment..... Ya, I'm worthless.
     
  11. rocshaman

    rocshaman New Member

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    I was born in '56 and I've raised two great, hard working and responsible kids. They're both now in their 30's and in turn are raising great kids of their own. Axxe hit the nail on the head when he said that kids are a product of their environment. I always tried to instill a sense of responsibility in my kids and made sure they knew there were consequences for their actions, both good and bad. Saying that today's younger generation are a bunch of bums paints way to broad of a stroke. I come from rural America and most of the young folk around here are hard working, respectful and just all around good people. Of course there are always going to be a few bad eggs but every generation has those. We called 'em hoods back when I was a kid, but it goes back a lot farther than that. And I also expect location has a lot to with what you are or aren't experiencing with young people.
     
  12. winds-of-change

    winds-of-change The Balota's Staff Member

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    Who said you were worthless? I admire your work ethic and your dedication to your family immensely. You are awesome!

    Let me also add, I rarely, if ever, physically disciplined my kids. By discipline, I hope no one means hitting or 'whuppin'.
     
  13. locutus

    locutus Well-Known Member Supporter

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    WOC, every child is different. They respond to different measures. Some should never be spanked. Some will respond to nothing else.

    A parent has to figure out what works and what doesn't. My son was spanked only 3 or 4 times, and that was when he was a toddler. Nothing else worked. After he started school, it was unnecessary. he responded to removal of privileges.

    He's now college educated, a wildlife biologist, taxpayer, homeowner, republican activist and overall a good citizen.

    Friend of mine had two boys. The elder responded well to reason and "chewing out." The younger required daily spanking until Jr. high. Both are senior officers in the Air Force today.
     
  14. 25-5

    25-5 New Member

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    Friend of mine had two boys. The elder responded well to reason and "chewing out." The younger required daily spanking until Jr. high. Both are senior officers in the Air Force today.[/QUOTE]

    Nothing like a crack on the a$$ in the early years.
     
  15. Warrior1256

    Warrior1256 New Member

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    I, too, was born in 1956. As for the younger generation: Since the beginning of time the older generation has complained about the laziness, moral corruption, etc. of the younger generation, including our parents. But still, the world and nation seems to keep going.
     
  16. 25-5

    25-5 New Member

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    It's not the going. It's the direction!
     
  17. winds-of-change

    winds-of-change The Balota's Staff Member

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    I agree. My daughter was much more difficult than my two sons put together. ROFL She did get a few spankings. As long as it is dealt with love and tolerance and not become the beatings from an angry parent, it seems reasonable.
     
  18. Devin556

    Devin556 New Member

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    I grew up in a well disciplined home. I can remember almost every whippin I had and I can say I deserved every one I ever got and quite a few I didn't. Other than 2 speeding tickets I've never been in trouble with the law. I am now 24 years old with a wife and a son. I've been through college and will have my mobile home paid for after my taxes come in this year and will start building a home towards the end of next year. I do believe the moral compass of some of my generation points a little bit the wrong way but I do believe as we get older and wiser that will change. That's just my .02 cents though.
     
  19. WebleyFosbery38

    WebleyFosbery38 New Member

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    Kids arent bad today, hell, most of the kids were talking about arent even kids anymore! A few phrases remind me how we got to today- "My kids will have it better than I did", "He/ She is not old enough for these types of pressures yet, stop pushing them", "Let them be kids for gods sake" and a few other well meaning thoughts progressive parents have repeated without thinking about what they are saying.

    What is a "kid" (other than a young goat)? When I was born in 61, the legal definition was anyone under 18 and some rights of passage could come even earlier with a parents signature. Today, 50 years later- there are 12 or more ages of passage and until your 27, your not considered a full fledged adult. In the 40's, 17 year old servicemen husbands with 14 year old wives fought in wars, had homes and kids before they were even eligible to vote. They were Adults by every measure of the word. Today, our 26 year old "kids" bring their 23 year old pregnant girl friends home to live and Mom ends up raising another generation while Jr tries for his second Associates degree and heads off to spring break!

    Actions not ages are the real "rights of passage", once you pass certain benchmarks like creating a baby, you cannot turn back even if your only 15. We knew that 50 years ago but today keep trying to cram Jr or Missy back into the Birth Canal for further gestation," He's not ready yet", (he never will be either...).

    For some reason, we dont find it odd that a 17 year old can carry a machine gun in combat but cant buy a pistol when he gets back home. Your old enough to drive a car but not drink a beer. Your not old enough to consent to sex but if you do consent, HIPPA and other protections allow you to get an Abortion without your parents permission or knowledge. The confusing ages of demarcation make sense to nobody, including our clueless "Children, ages 1 to 27 years old"

    No immune system starts out strong, it must be tempered and honed via graduated exposure to the dangerous elements. Its a damn cruel world outside of the womb, never has been more so than today. We load them up with rights from every direction but hold off on the responsibilities until we think they are ready. Our reaction to that should be to teach them the hard lessons early and often and stop trying to shelter them from every storm. Nature seems to be making them ready long before Parents believe they are and thats like sending a kid out the door with a shotgun without teaching them the safe, legal and proper use of one!

    Im advocating strong parenting not strong arm beatings or mental abuse. Parenting is much like JR Basic Training, thats the safe place to learn about the possible dangers to come. Their are ways to teach lifes lessons and methods of learning that are less than devastating but very strong and effectual. Like My Drill said, you only have one chance to get some things right when games turn to reality! Just one chance, its really just sending them off to play Russian Roulette when we fail to arm them with the hard facts and solutions when its obvious they already have the tools to hurt themselves and others at a younger and younger age.
     
    Last edited: Feb 6, 2013
  20. dermamorphic

    dermamorphic New Member

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    The son of the noted author, Dr. Spock, committed suicide. Having only read about half of the book myself it didn't fall into what I thought was the proper way to raise my own children.