If Warriors asked J.D. for weapons help

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by TWMIM, Aug 24, 2012.

  1. TWMIM

    TWMIM New Member

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    Greetings, J.D., I am Thor!

    I'm looking to add rails to my faithful hammer Mjolnir! I thinks it's time to bring some Tacticool to Valhalla!

    What do you suggest, mortal?

    (Thnx, BTW.)

    Thor

    Sent from my Aasgardian Blackberry
     
  2. TWMIM

    TWMIM New Member

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    Hi, J.D.

    Could you PM me details with that whole beavertail thing? I'm working on something. Well, a build, really.

    Thanks.

    JMB
     

  3. TWMIM

    TWMIM New Member

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    J.D.

    Nyum nyum nyum nyum Mil Tac?


    [ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6v15nOd1SM[/ame]
     
  4. dog2000tj

    dog2000tj New Member

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    JD,
    Long time trolling, first time posting ... I've got this bully that keeps hounding me. He is so much bigger than me and I am not very strong. Can you recommend a throwing weapon for me?

    Thanks,
    David
     
  5. dog2000tj

    dog2000tj New Member

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    JD,
    Do you think adding scythed wheels to my fleet of chariots will increase my chances of victory tomorrow at Alesia?

    Thanks,
    Ceaser
     
  6. Dillinger

    Dillinger New Member

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    What there'll is wrong with you man?! Grab hold of what is left of your senses! Adding rails is only going to increase drag and cause you to hang silly little ornaments off it like its a Christmas tree. You'll be the laughing stock of Ragnarok!

    Get back to practice and leave Tacticool to the ninjas.


    I don't know what to tell JMB, the design is so simple a child could work on it. Have you thought that perhaps designing and engineering aren't for you? Perhaps that guy Alexander Grand Buzzer could use some help

    I have no damn idea what you are on about there sport, but I would keep an eye on that guy who is watching you warm up and is timing something. You might find yourself on the wrong end of a Viagra study. :eek:


    A bully? Get to the gym and learn some jui jitsu and some good basic striking. What? You want to saunter out there into the field with some throwing stars or a slingshot?


    Where's your pride man?


    Do want help picking out a purse that matches? I can get you Leslie Chow's office number.


    Caesar? The salad guy? Love your work but what is with the anchovies I get at some restaurants? What were you thinking there? Or I should ask about smoking!


    Scythed wheels?! On a chariot? Are you daft? Have you been breeding in house again?


    Everyone knows the purpose of the chariots is to ride close together like the Blue Angels and make wide, sweeping impressive turns with white smoke coming off the back to entertain and confuse. If you go equipping each wheel with 2 plus feet of rotating steel the damn chariots will all be running around like monkeys at their first fire.


    Is that really the message you want to be sending?
     
  7. NitroxAZ

    NitroxAZ New Member

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    JD,

    I have a couple of questions for you. Me and the boys are thinking of sacking the European continent for kicks.

    1. Should we stick with our bows and axes or try something a little kinder and gentler?

    2. Should we braid our horses mains and tails? We are thinking of changing our "look" and becoming a little more fashion forward. I have been digging that dressage look that is so popular lately.

    Your Pal,
    Attila
     
  8. Dillinger

    Dillinger New Member

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    My Dear Attila - Please stop sending me invites to join your conqueringbook page, I have no idea what the hell conqueringbook is, but I assume it must be HEAVILY watched by the Romans and the English.

    Look, let's not beat around the bush here. You are a man of considerable wealth and influence, but your taste is clearly in your horses backside My Friend.

    You are a horseman, you aren't "competing" in Europe's Next Top Barbarian.

    What's next after the braiding and the flowers and the colorful banners?

    Are you going to start eating vegetables instead of grilled meat?

    Are you going to start asking consent before attempting entering a town to pillage? Oh wait, you would also be asking for donations, not taking what you wanted.

    It's a slippery slope my friend, do you REALLY want to be the ruler who brought perfume to the Nomads?? :confused:

    Can I offer you the name of a fine, FRENCH Fashion consultant for your surrender flag? :eek:
     
  9. PrimePorkchop

    PrimePorkchop New Member

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    ...I am so confused....

    [​IMG]
     
  10. dog2000tj

    dog2000tj New Member

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    JD,
    I have been have trouble communicating with aquatic life due to the Navy's use of their advanced sonar. Can you recommend something to help me out?

    Thanks,
    Aquaman
     
  11. dog2000tj

    dog2000tj New Member

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    JD,
    I am having trouble getting beyond infinity, any suggestions?

    Respectfully,
    Buzz Lightyear
     
  12. dog2000tj

    dog2000tj New Member

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    JD,
    As a woman I am always fixated with my figure. As time goes by I feel as if I am losing it, do you recommend I try some Spanx?

    Eternally,
    Wonder Woman
     
  13. dog2000tj

    dog2000tj New Member

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    JD,
    The wife and I have been arguing a lot lately. She wants to move to AZ but I keep telling her I have a problem with that. Can you help?

    Stay frosty,
    Frozone
     
  14. Jpyle

    Jpyle New Member

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    JD:

    I am having a hell of a time with 300 or so Spartan a-holes that just refuse to succumb to the greatness that is Xerxes. My best warriors assembled from the far corners of the world have been unsuccessful at breaching their phalanx and they mock my archers. Those pricks have even used the bodies of my army to fortify their defenses...

    Xerxes - God King
     
  15. Dillinger

    Dillinger New Member

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    You're still alive? Seriously?! I would have thought the rest of the Justice League would have sacrificed you to the Legion of Doom by now.

    Okay look Fishboy - I hate to break it to you, and I know in this world of pussified males society is raising now you think you fit in, but you just aren't relevant anymore. The reason you can't communicate with the fishes is THEY AREN'T LISTENING TO YOU!

    Might I suggest volunteering for some work at Seaworld?

    Keep masturbating Buzz, you will eventually get there.

    2W - So happy to hear that you are finally talking to me again. A woman of your refinement, and amazing ability to deflect fast moving items headed for your face and eyes ;), is a skillset that is unmatched by female super heroes.

    Might I suggest you adopt a more "Invisible Jet" approach to your wardrobe? I have research contacts that are working on a see thru kevlar that actually shrinks have a size when heat activated. You get dressed at home, you start fighting crime and the suit adopts a more corset form. Not to mention with those headlights you are sporting your foes will be at your mercy. :cool:

    Explain it like this. If you want to keep the deep lovin from Little Frozone, you are going to put the idea of Arizona out of your mind woman. Then have her make you a sandwich and thank you for your insight.

    Godking - Are you familiar with the phrase "Don't tug on Superman's cape?" The only way you stand a chance against the Spartans is if you equip your troops with 1911's, light sabers and swap out your bows for custom built sniper rifles.

    Basically your screwed with a capital EFF. I suggest a fall back and to try and conquer the lands around Sparta. Use economic terrorism on them.
     
  16. Jpyle

    Jpyle New Member

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    What is this 1911 of which you speak...Glockus of Germania, my royal armorer, assures me that his alchemists have assembled the best of all weapons known to man.
     
  17. Dillinger

    Dillinger New Member

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    Blasphemy! Your royal armorer is nothing buy a latreen commander masquerading in the 'guise of an expert.

    Johnivus of Browning, from across the great sea, is the Grandfather of all weapon designers.

    Consult your Oracles. Dispatch of impostors as you see fit.
     
  18. dog2000tj

    dog2000tj New Member

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    JD,
    So far all of my efforts to destroy the earth have been foiled by a pesky hare. And I have run low on my stockpile of Illudium Pu-36. Do you have a suggestion for an alternate plan?

    Truly,
    Marvin