My boss handed me his Thompson sub machine gun Friday night and told me that shooting it was better than sex. So I plopped down a twenty and bought me a fifty pack of 45s. I was always a big fan of the TV series the Untouchables and really got off on the part in the beginning of the show when their cutting loose with the Thompson and there is a constant light show coming off the muzzle. It was after hours at the range so I loaded a 30 rounder, sent a blue man down to 25 yard line, shut off the lights and proceeded to fire. I tried one three shot burst, which didn't do anything for me and proceeded to cut loose. Well to say the least, that date only lasted a couple of seconds. I lit a smoke and laid back for a while and it wasn't long before I was ready for round two, you all can call me Mr. Two-times from now on. I turned on the lights and the blue dude target had hit the floor and there was brass everywhere. I told the boss later that he was right, although, I didn't think I could afford that date too often. After I closed up for the night I went home and told the wife that we are taking a second mortgage out on the house because I needed twenty thousand dollars. She asked me what hair-brained scheme had I'd come up with now and when I told her, all she said was, Joe turn off the lights and go to bed. I guess her not taking me serious didn't bother me too much because I was pretty spent and wasn't a virgin any longer.