How's this for apocolyptic literature?

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by Gojubrian, May 26, 2009.

  1. Gojubrian

    Gojubrian New Member

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    A Pastors wife's letter. This was written in biblical prose as a commentary of current events.


    [COLOR="Green]
    And it came to pass in the Age of Insanity that the people of
    the land called America, having lost their morals, their initiative,
    and their will to defend their liberties, chose as their Supreme
    Leader that person known as "The One".

    He emerged from the vapors with a message that had no meaning; but
    He hypnotized the people telling them, "I am sent to save you.
    My lack of experience, my questionable ethics, my monstrous ego,
    and my association with evil doers are of no consequence. For I
    shall save you with Hope and Change.

    Go, therefore, and proclaim throughout the land that he who
    preceded me is evil, that he has defiled the nation, and that all he
    has built must be destroyed." And the people rejoiced, for even
    though they knew not what "The One" would do, he had promised
    that it was good; and they believed.
    And "The One" said "We live in the greatest country in the world. Help me
    change everything about it!"
    And the people said, "Hallelujah! Change is good!"

    Then He said, "We are going to tax the rich fat-cats." And the
    people said "Sock it to them!"
    "And redistribute their wealth."
    And the people said, "Show us the money!"
    And then He said, "Redistribution of wealth is good for
    everybody"

    And Joe the plumber asked, "Are you kidding me? You're going to steal my money and give it to the deadbeats??" And "The One" ridiculed and taunted him, and Joe's
    personal records were hacked and publicized.

    One lone reporter asked, "Isn't that Marxist policy?"
    And she was banished from the kingdom!

    Then a citizen asked, "With no foreign relations experience and
    having zero military experience or knowledge, how will you deal with
    radical terrorists?" And "The One" said, "Simple. I shall sit with
    them and talk with them and show them how nice we really are; and
    they will forget that they ever wanted to kill us all!" And the
    people said, "Hallelujah!! We are safe at last, and we can beat our
    weapons into free cars for the people!"

    Then "The One" said, "I shall give 95% of you lower taxes." And
    one, lone voice said, "But 40% of us don't pay ANY taxes." So "The
    One" said, "Then I shall give you some of the taxes the fat-cats
    pay!" And the people said, "Hallelujah!! Show us the money!"

    Then "The One" said, "I shall tax your Capital Gains when you
    sell your homes!" And the people yawned and the slumping housing
    market collapsed. And He said, "I shall mandate employer- funded health care for
    EVERY worker and raise the minimum wage. And I shall give every
    person unlimited healthcare and medicine and transportation to the
    clinics." And the people said, "Give me some of that!"

    Then he said, "I shall penalize employers who ship jobs
    overseas." And the people said, "Where's my rebate check?"

    Then "The One" said, "I shall bankrupt the coal industry and
    electricity rates will skyrocket!" And the people said, "Coal is
    dirty, coal is evil, no more coal! But we don't care for that part
    about higher electric rates." So "The One" said, "Not to worry. If
    your rebate isn't enough to cover your expenses, we shall bail you
    out. Just sign up with ACORN and your troubles are over!"

    Then He said, "Illegal immigrants feel scorned and slighted.
    Let's grant them amnesty, Social Security, free education, free
    lunches, free medical care, bi-lingual signs and guaranteed
    housing..." And the people said, "Hallelujah!!" And they made
    him King!

    And so it came to pass that employers, facing spiraling costs
    and ever-higher taxes, raised their prices and laid off workers.
    Others simply gave up and went out of business and the economy sank
    like unto a rock dropped from a cliff.
    The banking industry was destroyed. Manufacturing slowed to a
    crawl. And more of the people were without a means of support.

    Then "The One" said, "I am the "The One" - The Messiah - and I'm
    here to save you! We shall just print more money so everyone will
    have enough!" But our foreign trading partners said unto Him, "Wait
    a minute. Your dollar is not worth a pile of camel dung! You will
    have to pay more..." And the people said, "Wait a minute. That is
    unfair!!" And the world said, "Neither are these other idiotic
    programs you have embraced. Lo, you have become a Socialist state
    and a second-rate power. Now you shall play by our rules!"

    And the people cried out, "Alas, alas!! What have we done?" But
    yea verily, it was too late. The people set upon "The One" and spat
    upon him and stoned him, and his name was dung. And the once mighty
    nation was no more; and the once proud people were without
    sustenance or shelter or hope. And the Change "The
    One" had given them was as like unto a poison that had destroyed
    them and like a whirlwind that consumed all that they had built.
    And the people beat their chests in despair and cried out in anguish,
    "Give us back our nation and our pride and our hope!!" But it was
    too late, and their homeland was no more.[/COLOR]