Good CLEAN Joke Thread.

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by cpttango30, Sep 23, 2009.

  1. cpttango30

    cpttango30 New Member

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    This is the thread for good clean funny jokes.

    Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, And every year Morris would say, 'Esther, I'd like to ride in that helicopter.'

    Esther always replied, 'I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, And fifty dollars is fifty dollars'

    One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, 'Esther, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.'

    To this, Esther replied, 'Morris that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.'

    The pilot overheard the couple and said, 'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don't say a word I won't charge you a penny!

    But if you say one word it's fifty dollars.'

    Morris and Esther agreed and up they went.

    The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard.

    He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, But still not a word.

    When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, 'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!'

    Morris replied, 'Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out,

    But you know, fifty dollars is fifty dollars!'
     
  2. rifleman1

    rifleman1 New Member

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    so a baby seal walked into a club,.....
     

  3. CA357

    CA357 New Member Supporter

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    10 characters :D
     
  4. BigByrd47119

    BigByrd47119 New Member

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    My new truck

    Not sure just how clean this is but here she goes!!!

    MY NEW TRUCK

    I bought a new GMC Sierra and returned it to the dealer yesterday because I couldn't get the radio to work.. The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated.

    'Nelson,' the salesman said to the radio.

    The radio replied, 'Ricky or Willie?'

    'Willie!' he continued and 'On The Road Again' came from the speakers.

    Then he said, 'Ray Charles!' and in an instant ' Georgia On My Mind' replaced Willie Nelson.

    I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I'd say, 'Beethoven,' I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said, 'Beatles,' I'd get one of their awesome songs.

    Yesterday, some guy ran a red light and nearly creamed my new truck, but I swerved in time to avoid him. I yelled, 'Ass Hole!'

    Immediately the radio responded with, "Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States ."


    Damn I love this truck!