[Tackleberry1]

Three years ago I received my first speeding ticket in over 20 years...

Traveling highway 30 in Oregon Heading to Astoria I was clocked going 72 in a 55.

The first thing that struck me funny was that the OSP officer was maybee 5'2" of compacted little man's syndrome...so he asks me sir, do you know how fast you were going? To which I replied honestly, "not exactly but I'm pretty sure I was north of 70".

He then says, "I noticed your Washington plates, are you aware that OR SR's are 55?" To which I again answer honestly " yep, just was not paying attention to my speed".

Now you'd think that a working guy, traveling for work, in a company rig, with a spotless driving record would be the type of citizen an LEO could just issue a warning too...right?

Nooo...He steps back up to my truck, "after taking 30 minutes to do god knows what", and hands me a ticket! So now I'm thinking, you little *****! But, hey, whatever, its $119.00 I'm SURE the State can spend more wisely that I can.

So I take a breath, ready to part ways when this guy decides to launch into his RED ASPHALT safety speech as though I'm some 16 year old driving a tricked out street racer rice burning POS.

Well this is about all I can take when "without much thought", I interrupted him by saying "HOLD ON THERE BACON BITS"..."did I mention he was really short"..."You get to give me EITHER the ticket OR the speech. You DON'T get to give me both!"

To which he replies with some confusion, "...but, I already wrote the ticket"

So I said, "then I guess were done here?" and hold out my hand for my license and registration.

The officer pauses for about 3 seconds, gets quite Red in the face while looking back and forth between me and my paperwork which is still in his hand and finally hands me back my stuff and says "drive safely" before stomping back to his cruiser...

 

[mountainman13]

Bacon bits....priceless!

 

[Tackleberry1]

Bacon bits....priceless!

I thought that was one of my better quips.

 

[94browninghunt]

People in Illinois go 75-80 in a "55" You're gonna get honked at and flipped off if you go 55 lol.

 

[Tackleberry1]

People in Illinois go 75-80 in a "55" You're gonna get honked at and flipped off if you go 55 lol.

You do out here too. Washington Interstates at 70 and I think Oregons are 65 but the secondary highways are where they stick you.

 

[2ndAmendmentFreedom]

Oh ya in Chicago the Lakeshore Drive's (41) speed limit is 40 but in average we drive at 60 and some people go up to 80. State police are usually the annoying ones and will pull you over for going 2MPH over the speed limit (and tell you to slow down, usually no ticket).

 

[winds-of-change]

I had a funny traffic stop once, too. I was very young and had a car that needed a muffler. So, I get pulled over and the officer tells me he stopped me for a loud muffler and asks to see my license and to get out of the car. I had it over to him and I know I had a nervous look on my face as I was in the city of Chicago proper and I was nervous about dealing with the "Chicago Police". Well, he stares at my driver's license for a long time then he said to me, "Why did you lie on your driver's license?" Well, now I'm REALLY scared. I stutter and sputter and say, "I didn't lie on my driver's license. Why do you think I did?" Then he said, "You lied about your height. It says 4'11" on here and I'll bet your really shorter than that." Well, then I started to laugh. He let me go with a warning.

 

[94browninghunt]

Can you ever a get a ticket for going to slow?

 

[kytowboater]

Can you ever a get a ticket for going to slow?

Yep. You sure can.

 

[mountainman13]

Can you ever a get a ticket for going to slow?

Yep. I've seen highways with minimum speeds posted.

 

[kytowboater]

My traffic stops never were speed relevant but well deserved.

 

[Tackleberry1]

Can you ever a get a ticket for going to slow?

Funny story # 2. Coming home from the gun club one Sunday, telling my shooting buddy the Bacon Bits story, I look up into my rear view and see a Washington State trooper riding my tail, no sooner do I tell my friend, "look, now this jack *** is going to stop me" that he lights me up and after checking us out, gives me a warning for driving 5 under the speed limit...

Now, this WST looked like he was 17 years old and I nearly chewed a hole in my cheek to keep from asking if his Moma knew he was playing cops and robbers...

Honestly, it was the NFL Playoff day and about 2 in the afternoon so I think he was just looking for drunks.
Tack

 

[winds-of-change]

Honestly, it was the NFL Playoff day and about 2 in the afternoon so I think he was just looking for drunks.
Tack

I'll bet that was it. I know I've been stopped for 'stupid reasons' because I'm out and about late at night due to my work schedule. I know they are checking to see if I'm drunk. Particularly if I happen to be out right around the times the bars are closing.

 

[Durangokid]

Many years ago when Mercury was making cars with big V8s I was crossing the Red Desert. The sun was just pushing up above the Yampa Valley. I decided to give the Big Merc its head going down a grade to the desert floor. The Big Merc engine was screaming and the speedometer was chasing the 130 mark. The valves started to fail and the engine was cutting out. Just as I passed thru the little desert town of Bear Oil I saw 2 Wyoming HP Units with their radar on me. I passed them like the wind. I started slowing the Merc it was shaking all over as it dropped from 3 digits down to zero. The Trooper walked up with a smile and said "How has your day been up to now'? He asked how fast did your speedometer read? He said I have never clocked a car in 20 years running that fast. I just wondered how close my radar gun was. I said about 125 when I saw him. Not bad he said, I got a solid at 119 MPH. The Trooper said I am busy here. Can I trust you to go to Rawlins and turn youself into the court. Yes sir I will.

 

[primer1]

My grandma was taking a friends cat to the vet, but it didn't like car rides. It panicked and crawled on her head, digging in its claws. Naturally it made her swerve as she tried to keep the car on the road. When the statey pulled her over and walked up to the car, he looked puzzled and asked why she had a cat on her head. She told the story as it crawled off her head. He walked away without even asking for her license.

No2: same grandma was pulled over for whatever reason and she panicked as his head was inside her window. She accidently hit the up on the power window, knocking off his big hat into her lap. She rolled the window back down and said "i think this is yours". He was pissed but walked away without asking for her license.

I'm not recommending either of these to get out of a ticket.

 

[flyspooky]

Durango: Did you actually go turn yourself in?

Years ago, a friend of mine playing a senior prank got caught by the police hanging a banner at school one night. They put him in the back and drove to the station. When they got there, they popped the trunk and opened the back of the squad car, telling my buddy to "wait here while we go fill out the arrest paperwork" and walked inside. The funny part was my buddy said he waited by himself in the back of the open squad car for 15 minutes before he figured out they were letting him go.

 

[levelcross]

Bacon bits....priceless!

Gotta remember that one.....


I got pulled one morning going to work in the snow. Here in NC a few inches of snow will shut down the cities. I was driving a full sized Chevy van and going around a couple of sharp turns the rear end started to slide around on me. Instead of freaking out I just let it slide and after getting thru the first turn it straightened out just fine. Going thru the second turn it does the same thing and as it straightens out again I see the city cop turn on the lights to pull me.

He jumps out of the car and asks me why I am all over the road. I replied that in a van with snow on the roads the rear end will slide sometimes and I was only going about 20MPH with no one else on the road. He told me if I couldn't keep from sliding around the turns to park the van, this set me off and I told him to get the D*** snow off the road and I would stop sliding in it. He asks for my license and registration and runs my tags so I figure I am getting a ticket. When he comes back he has changed his attitude completely, then I remembered that the van was registered in my FIL's name who was a LEO at the time for the city. The look on his face was priceless.

 

[JonM]

We had just gotten ccw in texas and i was one of the first through and had just got my card. I was traveling back from a gunshow in austin in my truck with a norinco m1a clone sitting in the seat next to me. In texas its legal to carry rifles in a vehicle any way you want.

Some loon called in that i was pointing a rifle at people... so i get stopped by the texas highway patrol. Officer is nice and friendly i tell him im ccwing and my gun is in the center console.

He takes my sig p220 and hands it to his partner obviously a young guy and asks me to step out. So i did. I asked him why he stopped me and he said someone complained i was pointing a rifle at oeople while driving. He looked at the norinco and i said yeah... how is it possible to put that gun in any position other than straightup in the seat. He said yup musta been a moron.

While this was going on I noticed his partner trying to unload my firearm. He had it muzzle to chest with the magazine in trying to rack the slide. I told the officer i was talking to, sir i want you to notice im totally unarmed and being peaceful. I dont want to be charged with anything when your partner shoots himself. He turned around and about as fast as ive ever seen anyone move grabbed my sig and put it in the bed of my truck.

He told me to leave it there until they left. They went back to their car with the trooper yelling at his partner about pointing guns in safe directions lol.

 

[mountainman13]

I've hears of cup checks but that's ridiculous. Lol

 

[AIKIJUTSU]

We had just gotten ccw in texas and i was one of the first through and had just got my card. I was traveling back from a gunshow in austin in my truck with a norinco m1a clone sitting in the seat next to me. In texas its legal to carry rifles in a vehicle any way you want.

Some loon called in that i was pointing a rifle at people... so i get stopped by the texas highway patrol. Officer is nice and friendly i tell him im ccwing and my gun is in the center console.

He takes my sig p220 and hands it to his partner obviously a young guy and asks me to step out. So i did. I asked him why he stopped me and he said someone complained i was pointing a rifle at oeople while driving. He looked at the norinco and i said yeah... how is it possible to put that gun in any position other than straightup in the seat. He said yup musta been a moron.

While this was going on I noticed his partner trying to unload my firearm. He had it muzzle to chest with the magazine in trying to rack the slide. I told the officer i was talking to, sir i want you to notice im totally unarmed and being peaceful. I dont want to be charged with anything when your partner shoots himself. He turned around and about as fast as ive ever seen anyone move grabbed my sig and put it in the bed of my truck.

He told me to leave it there until they left. They went back to their car with the trooper yelling at his partner about pointing guns in safe directions lol.

You're really lucky he didn't shoot himself. If he had, the other guy may have shot you, then claimed that you shot the idiot.