Unfortunately, there is no full power .357 load that will not be "brutal" in a SP101.
Since this is a defensive type weapon, I would focus on 125 grain loads. 158 are better suited for hunting.
H110 for loading is a good powder. I use it for all of my .357 and .44 magnum loads regardless of bullet weight.
The mods have asked that I do not post my primer choice so I'll leave that to others.