Are you an Ophiuchus?

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by canebrake, Jan 14, 2011.

  1. canebrake

    canebrake New Member

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    Are you an Ophiuchus? (OFF-ee-YOO-kuss)


    Important life decisions have been made according to horoscopes; jewelry and clothing proclaiming one's sign have been purchased. Lives have been forever altered because someone in a bar didn't like the response they heard when they asked one of the most famous pick-up lines of all time: "Hey baby, what's your sign?" They can't just go and change it!

    But they have. Here are the new dates, see if yours is affected:

    Capricorn: Jan. 20 – Feb. 16
    Aquarius: Feb. 16 – March 11
    Pisces: March 11– April 18
    Aries: April 18 – May 13
    Taurus: May 13 – June 21
    Gemini: June 21 – July 20
    Cancer: July 20 – Aug. 10
    Leo: Aug. 10 – Sept. 16
    Virgo: Sept. 16 – Oct. 30
    Libra: Oct. 30 – Nov. 23
    Scorpio: Nov. 23 – Nov. 29
    Ophiuchus: Nov. 29 – Dec. 17
    Sagittarius: Dec. 17 – Jan. 20

    If you were born between November 29 and December 17, congratulations -- you're an Ophiuchus! What the? Now that our collective minds have been blown and we have to reassess our astrological signs and our personalities, let's figure out who the new kid is on the zodiac.

    Is the Ophiuchus man gregarious or brooding? The Ophiuchus woman adventurous or cautious? I'm sure plenty of astrologers will be adjusting their dials to fill us all in, but until the tropical astrologers switch over to the sidereal (or Hindu) method, I'll fill you in on some fun facts about the 13th sign of the zodiac. Including what celebrities fall under the sign of the serpent.

    [​IMG]

    The Ophiuchus constellation is supposed to be a man holding a snake, as seen above. Which is why the other name for Ophiuchus -- which means serpent-bearer -- is Serpentarius (which I think sounds much better). The symbol also looks like a snake wrapped around a pole, not unlike the physician's symbol.

    Today's Horoscope (which they say could cover months under the sign -- so buckle your seat belts, Ophiuchus!):

    You are trying to escape the routine, dull, and ordinary aspects of your life. You try to find new things that will make your life more exciting and stimulating. But with every effort of this kind, circumstances, duties, and obligations seem to hold you back and keep you stuck in an oppressive situation. You may get to a point where the pressure is unbearable, and then you will make a sudden break for freedom. You may suddenly leave a relationship, an oppressive job, or your place of residence, without warning anyone.

    Crazy times ahead for the 13th sign. But you'll be in good company, as these famous folks also fall under the spell of the serpent:

    Canebrake
    Taylor Swift
    Britney Spears
    Mark Twain
    Ben Stiller
    Kirk Douglas
    Dick Clark
    Woody Allen
    Nicki Minaj
    Jeff Bridges
    Walt Disney
    Ozzy Osbourne
    Julianne Moore
    Harry Reid
    Lucy Liu
    Margaret Cho
    Teri Hatcher
    Sinead O'Connor
    Dame Judi Dench
    John Malkovich
    Tom Waits
    Felicity Huffman
    Kim Basinger
    Ann Coulter
    Rod Blagojevich
    Jennifer Connelly
    Frank Sinatra
    Jamie Foxx
    Steve Buscemi
    Mary Todd Lincoln
    Vanessa Hudgens
    Don Johnson
    Ludwig van Beethoven
    Benjamin Bratt
    Bill Pullman

    Are you an Ophiuchus?
     
  2. Squirrel_Slayer

    Squirrel_Slayer New Member

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    I refuse to follow this new breakdown of signs, not that it really matters, but I don't want to be a Gemini, I'm staying a Cancer, so there.
     

  3. canebrake

    canebrake New Member

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    Must be an echo in here!

    Mrs. Canebrake JUST said the same thing.

    At least you can pronounce your new sign.

    Mine is Ophiuchus. [​IMG]
     
  4. danf_fl

    danf_fl Retired Supporter

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    Thanks Cane, Now I'm totally confused.

    I am no longer a Capricorn, but a Sagittarius.

    My Better Half, was a Sagittarius, and all I had to wonder was if she would shoot me. Now she is a Ophiuchus (Snake), and I have to figure out if she will still shoot me or bite me.

    As it is anyways, she is Herpetophobic.
     
  5. willfully armed

    willfully armed New Member

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    I'm thrilled, my new sign resembles a man with snakes protruding from under his skirt. How many directions can this go?
     
  6. Dillinger

    Dillinger New Member

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    I was born a Taurus and I am staying one. The new sign system can suck it.

    Sorry cane. :confused:
     
  7. canebrake

    canebrake New Member

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    That's so Freudian!

    I like it.

    But then........I like snakes.

    [​IMG]
     
  8. canebrake

    canebrake New Member

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    It's not my 'effin list. [​IMG]
     
  9. General_lee

    General_lee New Member

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    I'm still a Taurus PT51486 :D Haha see what I did there? No? ....Dang, I'll never be a comedian:(:D
     
  10. dog2000tj

    dog2000tj New Member

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    Been a Taurus all my life ..... going to continue to be a Taurus for the rest of my life! ;)
     
  11. danf_fl

    danf_fl Retired Supporter

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    Wasn't there a thread about Taurus reliability? (j/k)
     
  12. Gordo323

    Gordo323 New Member

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    Crap! I've been an Aries all of my life and now I'm a Pisces? WTF ?
    I guess it explains how all the daily newspaper horoscopes I read never came true! I wonder if I could sue for not buying the winning Lotto ticket because I was reading the wrong sign?
     
  13. saviorslegacy

    saviorslegacy New Member

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    I've been a Gemini all of my life. Why should I change now?
     
  14. Remy308

    Remy308 New Member

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    Nope, I stayed a Tarus, Stubborn as hell :D
     
  15. buckhuntr

    buckhuntr Well-Known Member Lifetime Supporter

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    I am and forever will remain an Aries, not a blasted Pisces! :mad: I don't particularly even LIKE fish. :confused:
     
  16. WDB

    WDB New Member

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    Went from Capicorn to Sagittarius:confused: My whole life is askew now...been on the wrong star trail all this time:eek: My winning numbers have been mis resprentented.......I plan to sue someone over this as I would have won the lottery on a regular basis if I had the right information:mad:
     
  17. AcidFlashGordon

    AcidFlashGordon New Member

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    I'm none of the above. I'm a grouchy, crotchety old fart.... [​IMG]


    ...and I'll beat you senseless with my cane if you disagree with me...
     
  18. dog2000tj

    dog2000tj New Member

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    Too stubborn to use spell check even? :p
     
  19. IGETEVEN

    IGETEVEN New Member

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    Well, went from Aquarius to Capricorn and the wife went from Gemini to Taurus. At least we are still compatible...;)
     
  20. bkt

    bkt New Member

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    Same here, and my sentiments exactly.

    (Not that I really give a damn. I never, ever read horoscopes.)