And The Devil Stood At Parade Rest

Discussion in 'The Club House' started by Benning Boy, Mar 5, 2009.

  1. Benning Boy

    Benning Boy New Member

    9,624
    1
    0
    Share your best Boot Camp story.:eek:
     
  2. roosterjuicer

    roosterjuicer New Member

    303
    1
    0
    I was standing watch and I heard a loud thump from the back of the compartment. I went to investigate and another recruit was lying in a pretty big puddle of his own blood because he purposefully rolled off his top top rack pretending to sleep walk so he could get a medical discharge. we had to wake everyone up and get the medical guys in there, needless to say that recruit had a rough time the next day for waking everyone up.

    another time my RDC petty officer puttnam (black guy) told one of the black guys in our division "you are black as hell, and its dark in here, but I see you smiling boy, shut those damn lips!" it was nearly impossible not to laugh
     

  3. Benning Boy

    Benning Boy New Member

    9,624
    1
    0
    My battle buddy was determined to get thrown out. He tried bedwetting, sleep walking, nothing worked. He goes on dental sick call, and they handed him some Tylenol-3. I find him slumped against a wall, unable to speak.

    I go busting into the Drills office, and I'm immediately told "Beat your face" (do push ups). When they're done with me, I tell them the story. I take them to my buddy.

    At this point, he's crying. He hands the Drill an empty pill bottle. The Drill, in his most compassionate voice, asks, "Boy, did you take all these pills?"
    My buddy, tears streaming, nods. "Well, I'm gonna let you f*****g die!" My Buddy's eyes bulge, my eyes bulge, and then I get dropped for more push ups.

    The Drill went off to call an ambulance, but then and there I knew there was no mercy, and I had arrived in Hell.:cool:
     
  4. roosterjuicer

    roosterjuicer New Member

    303
    1
    0
    good story benning. I have one along those lines.

    another recruit trying to get out drank a ton of the head cleaning supplies, seriously, several bottles of various cleaning supplies. he started throwing up everywhere and I was getting pretty worried because i was the starboard watch section leader and a guy under my command was on watch and didn't catch this guy sneaking into the cleaning closet.

    well my RDC was just standing there laughing at the recruit throwing up everywhere finally I break down and ask if he is going to call the ambulance or if the watch should. Puttnam said, "give him a couple minutes then I will call". I then explained to him that he drank several bottles of cleaning supplies and could die.

    Petty officer puttnam explained to me while i was doing 8 count body builders that this recruit wasn't the first guy to try this and all the cleaning supplies do is make you sick, they are non toxic and absolutely cant kill a person.
     
  5. Benning Boy

    Benning Boy New Member

    9,624
    1
    0
    8 count body builders. I'm starting to have flashbacks.:eek:

    We had a freak snowstorm, dropped about a foot in very little time. This was prior to morning P.T., and so we were convinced P.T. would be cancelled. Wrong.

    One Drill was a good ol boy, sitting on a platform with his hat cocked back, and he looked comical as hell. Then he starts screaming,"I'm gonna make me a snowman, write TRAINEE on his head, and BASH that m**********r all over the place!"

    P.T. actually ran longer that morning, with emphasis on any exercise that required you to lay on the ground.
     
  6. SGT-MILLER

    SGT-MILLER New Member

    2,350
    0
    0
    USAF Boot Camp. Day One.........


    I was walking into our barracks for the first time. I lined up against the wall with the other recruits. Our TI yelled at us "Find a freakin bunk! NOW!!!!!!". As I walked down the center aisle, I noticed that the world went topsy-turvy as the TI pushed me, linebacker-style, out of the middle aisle.

    "Don't ever walk down my freakin aisle! The next time I catch any one of you walking down my center aisle, I am going to push my thumb through your foreheads!!!!!"

    He also added. "Technically, I am not supposed to touch you recruits in any way! I invite one of you to report me!"

    .....no one ever did report him. He was the hardest TI, but he was fair, and I respected that man for getting me tough.
     
  7. od green

    od green New Member

    50
    0
    0
    First formation, I got caught looking down ranks and the TI came over and put the brim of his Smokey the bear hat on the brim of my hat while wearing the mirrored sunglasses Screaming in my face. I was scared crap less but when I saw in his glasses my expression I busted out laughing. That was the first closest near death experience . That was 1976 and I'm still doing push ups for that !!!!!
     
  8. jeepcreep927

    jeepcreep927 New Member

    1,105
    0
    0
    Nothing good in real boot camp, but I just returned from an Army program called Warrior Transition. It's for prior service members from other branches entering the Army, kinda a less sucky boot camp. Anyhow...

    One dude in my platoon realized he'd made a mistake in joiningn the Army and did everything he could to get chaptered out. Failed numerous PT tests, claimed family hardship, injuries, you name it. In an unrelated event he lost his IBA so he took one from another platoon. Upon TA 50 turn in he was found out.

    When the First Sergeant told him he was getting at the least an article 15 he seemed a little relieved thinking he would get booted too. Then the First Sergeant informed him that he just made E1 again. From E5. And would NOT be leaving the Army until his enlistment was up. Sometimes I guess Karma bites you...
     
  9. c3shooter

    c3shooter Administrator Staff Member

    21,445
    557
    113
    1960s, Ft Polk LA (armpit of the earth) trainee decided to commit suicide by hanging himself. Old WW II wooden 2 story barracks. Tied a tent rope to the railing of the fire escape (wooden) and around his neck, and jumped off. The wooden platform was pulled off the building, and fell on the trainee, breaking his arm.

    Note to self- stay the heck off the fire escapes.....:rolleyes:
     
  10. Benning Boy

    Benning Boy New Member

    9,624
    1
    0
    We had a guy claim to be gay (pre don't ask, don't tell). The Drill said that was fine, and he would start discharge paperwork, just as soon as the recruit performed an act on each member of the company to prove his orientation.:eek:

    He fell back into the ranks quietly, and demonstrated the "Dying Cockroach" for us extensively.
     
  11. roosterjuicer

    roosterjuicer New Member

    303
    1
    0
    "Im a nasty cockroach nasty as can be, no other cockroach is nasty as me":D fun times
     
  12. Benning Boy

    Benning Boy New Member

    9,624
    1
    0
    The cadences were classic. "Napalm sticks to kids!":D
     
  13. c3shooter

    c3shooter Administrator Staff Member

    21,445
    557
    113
    "Throw some candy to the orphans
    See them run and gather round.
    Take your 40 millimeter
    cut those little suckers down-
    Cause napalm sticks to kids!" :eek:

    Of course, the favorite was usually
    "Hey young soldier, don't feel blue-
    My recruiter was a liar too!"

    However, I think that one probably dates back to Hannibal and the Alps.....:cool:
     
  14. LongRifles Inc.

    LongRifles Inc. New Member

    41
    0
    0
    My Protestant Layleader tried to hang himself by his inspection tie.

    Our Senior showed him how to tie the knot properly for next time. Then he got bent for about 45 minutes in the pit.

    Funny, he never tried it again.
     
  15. roosterjuicer

    roosterjuicer New Member

    303
    1
    0
    "they say that in the Navy the pay is mighty fine..."
    "they give you a hundred dollars and take back 99"
     
  16. Benning Boy

    Benning Boy New Member

    9,624
    1
    0
    He said the world was round-O

    He said it could be found-O

    He navigates while he mas****ates

    The son-of-a b***h Columb-O
     
  17. c3shooter

    c3shooter Administrator Staff Member

    21,445
    557
    113
    Tune of "My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean"

    "They made him a Second Lieutenant-
    They gave him two bars made of gold-
    They made him a Forward Observer-
    He lived to be three seconds old-"

    "Some mothers have sons in the army-
    Some mothers have sons overseas-
    But mother, dear mother, don't worry-
    Your son is in ROTC"

    MY OCS class used to sing at the ROTC types in passing-
     
  18. Ghillie-Monster

    Ghillie-Monster New Member

    51
    0
    0
    I'm A Sea Cadet, and I went through 2 boot camps, My first one was Fun, PT at 5:00 in the morning every Day, Barley enough chow to make it through the day.

    funfun.

    Second one, one kid was ajusting to the chow, Starts complaining, goes to the Head, and lets out an Explosive Fart*. It wasn't even a sustained one, It all came out at once. The poor Kid Came out holding His @$$ and almost in tears!