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Old 06-30-2010, 03:52 AM   #1
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Talking Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck?

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.

Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you...

You are carrying a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

Democrat's Answer:

* Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

* Does the man look poor or oppressed?

* Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

* Could we run away?

* What does my wife think?

* What about the kids?

* Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

* What does the law say about this situation?

* Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?

* Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

* Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

* Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
* If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

* Should I call 9-1-1?

* Why is this street so deserted?

* We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.

* Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

* I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.

* This is all so confusing!

Republican's Answer:

BANG!

Redneck's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click..... (Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!BANG!BANG! Click

Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy!' 'Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?! '

Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?!'

Wife: 'You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!'

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Old 06-30-2010, 04:02 AM   #2
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Good one! I like that.

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Old 06-30-2010, 04:04 AM   #3
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I wasn't aware of it, but apparently, I can be an Italian redneck from Brooklyn,

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Old 06-30-2010, 04:26 AM   #4
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A year or two old, but still funny.

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Old 06-30-2010, 04:54 AM   #5
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All those bangs..Must have slammed a fresh mag...heh

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Old 06-30-2010, 04:56 AM   #6
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always a good one

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Old 06-30-2010, 05:04 AM   #7
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An oldie but a goodie.

Btw, collegekid20...is not Chris Titus anti-gun? Just curious as I don't know for 100% fact on that, but...

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Old 06-30-2010, 06:22 AM   #8
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Definitly a good one, I MUST be a Jersey redneck!

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Old 06-30-2010, 07:23 AM   #9
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Funny and true.

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Old 06-30-2010, 01:07 PM   #10
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Yep, I am definitely a redneck

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