my friends here....im frustrated and i want to vent out!
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Old 09-05-2009, 03:58 AM   #1
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Default my friends here....im frustrated and i want to vent out!

To my friends here. I'm frustrated as hell. First, I want to apologize in advance for my grammar. If you don't understand what I am about to say please let me know and I will try to explain myself better. I'm a 35yr old man. I became self aware around 4.5yrs ago. I feel prepare to some extend for whatever eventuality. I'm a firearm trainer, I have food, ammo, extra clothing, bug out bags, medicine and first aid kits. I have 2 possible bug out places where I know there is food, shelter, medicine and guns (inlaws). This is where I'm frustrated............for whatever reason I feel that I don't have enough. I will like to become more self reliant in the way of buying a house and do my own thing. I mean like growing your own food and cultivate your own garden. Cut my own wood for winter, learn how to hunt etc. I will like a little bit of isolation also. But I feel I will never accomplish that part of my life. I have awful credit, no money saved and not only that I live in a apartment. I want those things but I feel they were no meant to be. All I'm asking is for a simple life and I feel I can't accomplish that. I hate the bureaucratic system of life. Guys....the reason why I'm opening myself like this is because I'm trying to find some wisdom. Please if you have something to contibute do so. I need to find a way to reach this goal. Please this is an actual call for help. If you don't have anything positive to say don't waste my time. Thanks in advance

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Old 09-05-2009, 04:44 AM   #2
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Let mme jsut say first of all, I know EXACTLY how you feel! Yea, im young, but I feel your pain. I dont have the resouces for the things like you want, yet. Its my life goal to be able to eventually live completly independent of the rest of society. Not that I want to be a social outcast, but you know what I mean. The truth is, itll probably take a while to be able to achive the things you want and the things I want. Its a long term goal you see? As for wanting the supplies, its a addiction. Im in the same boat as you. Its not really a bad addiction as I do my best to embrase it. If your really serious about the goal you have for you life (as i belive you are) you must be willing to deal with all the obsticles in the way untill you can achive it/them. Set a course that can place these things in your future and remind yourself every day WHY you want to achive these goals and secure the determination and willpower it will surley take to achive them. Life as well as survival have always been, and always will be about your determionation!

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Old 09-05-2009, 11:42 AM   #3
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First of all, I think everyone on here can be proud of your honesty. You have a goal but think you can't reach it. You can with a few changes! keep foremost in your mind what you want then go for it... instead of buying that soft drink and snack at work, bring a sandwich and hit the water fountain. Trim small expenses, buy generic, hell, do without some things! Not to say it will be overnight, but you will do it! I just ordered a lathe to start messing with gun work, bought 2 1911's, an AR-15, and a Mossy tactical. Did I mention I have terminal lung cancer....never give up!!!

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Old 09-10-2009, 09:58 PM   #4
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The long and short of this is that no one else can really give you the answer you want. Credit scores and empty bank accounts can be fixed with a little dedication. Its like a doctor telling you to loose weight by diet and exercise, its not going to be fun or easy but its the best way to get what you want. The best advice I have is the idea of setting goals. They dont have to be large goals, infact setting your long term goal like you have is a great start. Now you need to figure out the small steps to get you there. Every paycheck before you do anything else with it put a preset amount into a savings account and act like its not even there.

I know for myself I have to be very careful with my goals because I will want to spend what little money I have on things that in the short term are of what should be a lower priority. For example, I just got a new job and I have almost no money saved, I am literally having to count every penny. However just before I moved into my new apartment I went out and purchased 3 mags and 100+ rounds of .308 for my LR-308. The idea for me was I wanted to get these things before the prices go up or they are no longer available. However I do believe this may not have been the best idea because that money could have been better for me if I had saved it for my goal of buying a house.

I guess the question I ask myself for almost any purchase is "do I HAVE to have this now?" If I even hesitate to answer this question then I actually have my answer and I walk away from what ever it is.

I hope this helps and that I was able to clearly explain what i was thinking.

SH

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Old 09-10-2009, 10:52 PM   #5
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Just about everyone who owns a house has been where you are, unless they are wealthy. If your credit sucks, do something to fix that! You will need a decent credit score to buy a house, especially these days, after the Liberal Democrats ruined the housing market by issuing loans to irresponsible people. Living in an apartment isn't the worst thing that could happen - the worst thing that could happen is you become homeless! You didn't tell us much about your backround so I'll assume you are married, have a job, and have parents and inlaws. Can you live with parents or inlaws temporarily to save enough money for a 10% downpayment on a house? Will they co-sign a home loan for you? How about buying undeveloped land that you can use for shooting/hunting with the long range goal of building a house? This would be much cheaper than buying a house, and would allow you some property for recreation and development in the future. How about getting a second job to help finance your dream? There are several options available if someone truly has a goal and is willing to do whatever it takes to achieve it. I spent 12 yrs. in the Marine Corp. which helped as far as money saved and GI bill benefits, but because of this I had zip for credit. I bought my first house for $69,000 in 1986. I made $50,000 profit when I sold it 4 years later, which is how I purchased the land on which I built my next house - the land was the collateral for the construction loan. It took me two years to build that house by myself while working a full-time job and living with my inlaws, who were kind enough to take me, the wife, and our two kids in. It would have taken me twice as long if I had to rent a house while I was building. If you have family that is willing and able to help you, there is no embarassment in accepting or asking for their help, because they are the only people in this world that will help you without expecting anything but a "thank you" in return.

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I'm a 35yr old man. I became self aware around 4.5yrs ago.
I guess you're a late bloomer too. Had you become "self aware" in your twenties we wouldn't be having this conversation!
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Old 09-14-2009, 07:35 PM   #6
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I lost my house about a year ago and I knew manufacturing jobs here in california were going to be hard to get after I lost my job so at 35 years old I decided to go to school to be a nurse. It was the best decision I ever made. sometimes you have to take a negative and turn it into a positive.

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Old 09-14-2009, 08:56 PM   #7
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A wise man once said "If you find you are in a hole, first step is to quit digging."


Our family is debt free, owns a home in the sticks, and enuff money in the bank to indulge ourselves now and again.

Couple of steps- First, do you do a budget? And is savings part of your budget?

Second, look at what you spend- on what. If lunch in the cafeteria is $6, and packing your lunch is a buck- start brown bagging. That's $25 a week, over $1200 a year. Gotta go rent the latest flick? Our library has a huge assortment of DVDs. Free. At 2 a week, that's $500 a year.

We don't drive new cars- but our cars are paid for, and run fine. If one needs a $300 repair once a year- lessee, $300 vs- uh- HOW much is your car payment? And I LIKE my 93 Lincoln Town Car!

Dead end job, wage slave, boss that studies Atilla the Hun? Check out local community college, and see what they teach you can learn. I have degrees in Engineering (earned at night), have a good job- and could get another in a day if I needed to.

Disclaimer here- I am NOT bragging (well, OK- maybe a little) Our current position is a result of several years of hard work- of NOT going out and buying the Honda Gold Wing, or deciding to go to Cancun (hey- there is credit available on THIS card!) Credit for things other than long term purchases (like a house) is like trying to swim with bags of lead shot in your skivvies. If you are in debt, quit charging, pay them down. Some are charging 18-20% interest. You will spend a lifetime paying interest, and never really pay the debt.


See if you can find someone in the country that you can apprentice yourself to for 2-3 days a week- no charge- in turn for learning how to can green beans, make sausage, dress a buck, plant potatoes, make biscuits from scratch. . Spend some time reading (library again)- no one can tax what is in your brain, and they cannot take it away.

Go get a legal pad, pencil, start making some notes, take that frustration and DO something with it. And please check in here and let us hear how things are going. It will not be quick or easy- good stuff usually is not.

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Old 09-14-2009, 09:39 PM   #8
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You really need to straighten out your credit. It can be done. Research everything on the web about it but don't believe everything you read. Negotiating with creditors when your credit is already bad with them is not always a good thing to do. You might wind up paying off your bill with them but the bad mark will remain on your credit report anyway. It's a bad system.

Take so much per week and start saving, no matter how little it is. Get into the habit and don't spend it no matter what. Think of your little savings account as a bill. You already know this, so just start doing it and deal with it for a few of years. Don't worry about your age. If you turn your life around right now with these two things, you will start to feel better. It's probably best that you will qualify to buy a house later in life - you'll probably be able to make a better, more learned decision about it.

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