A Little Humor For The Day
I write this with the last remaining power I have in my laptop. Everything else is down. No light, no heat, and no food.
This started as any other day. I was awake in bed noticing that it was just beginning to break day. I got up and looked out the window and then I saw him. It was kamikaze squirrel. Suddenly everything began to happen in slow motion. It was like a bad dream that I couldnít escape from. The squirrel ran down the power line until he reached his destination, the transformer. It was a slow motion train wreck that I couldnít stop. I could only watch in horror. Oh the horror.
Upon reaching his target there was a tremendous explosion. Fire and shrapnel flew in every direction. Then complete darkness. All that remained was the ringing in my ears, and the image permanently seared in my mind. The transformer, the power, and kamikaze squirrel were all gone in an eternal instant.
I panicked because it was breakfast time. What on earth would I do? How would I make it until lunch? Then it hit me; Iím thinking McDonalds. So I got in my truck and I drove. I drove and drove until I finally I reached the next block and there it was. The golden arches were glowing. They had been saved from the blackout.
I returned home quickly with the spoils from my outing. I sat down in the dim light of this cloudy rainy morning to enjoy my feast when I heard the mob. Society had completely broken down, mouse society that is. They came from nowhere and were suddenly everywhere. Then when I thought my hard won feast was lost to that mob they just scattered. When I saw the red glowing eyes I realized why. It was zombie mouse!!!!!
Oh, the powerís back on. I made it! I made it!
Now all I have to do is clean up all of the sheet rock dust and patch all the shot gun blasts in the walls. And of course burn the once again lifeless corpse of zombie mouse.
This morning was a wakeup call for me, and actually a benefit. While the events described here might not be entirely true, the boredom was. I realized my Les Paul guitar and Marshall amp are useless without power. So now I have a legitimate need for a new acoustic guitar. Iím thinking twelve string for the redundancy, and in a complete disaster one set of strings could be used to restring another guitar or a mandolin. Or they could be used to make a snare? So itís off to rummage through pawn shops for guns and guitars!
He won't have the guts to do that again
Now that's a shocking tail!
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