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Old 03-27-2013, 11:02 PM   #11
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I have also been a foster parent and even adopted four girls out of the foster care program. My youngest daughter is also "special needs." She is way below average intelligence and will likely need long term care when she grows up. I hope she finds lifelong love and companionship with someone who is capable of independent living. If I were in that situation, I would be extremely firm. I would hear his proposal and agree to discuss it with his parents and make sure he understood that we were leaving but would schedule a future date. Then hope the future would blossom.

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Old 03-27-2013, 11:18 PM   #12
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This is why I don't set myself up by doing these speculative scenarios. I take everything for face value at first, then reassess as things go.
One of the characteristics of pilots is an almost ritualistic study of other's accident reports. Through such we hope to think through many different scenarios so that when we encounter something similar, we can react faster with an appropriate response. I think there's value to the same idea here.

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I constantly see these posts which state the bad guy is 6'2"+ and 200lbs+ as if that is a reason to draw your weappon. You have to ask yourself, are you a man? Unbelieveable how afraid people are. If you are in a situation and they aren't violent and there are no weapons presented you will go to jail. Learn to fight, or better situational awareness. I'm 6'2" 240lbs and I have beat the crap out of 300 pounders and been laid out by a dude who was about 170. Size alone doesn't didctate an armed response...
My point being my friend was at a definite disadvantage. I would have considered myself as well. I have no illusions that I'm a physical match for a kid half my age and in much better shape.
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Old 03-27-2013, 11:20 PM   #13
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I have also been a foster parent and even adopted four girls out of the foster care program. My youngest daughter is also "special needs." She is way below average intelligence and will likely need long term care when she grows up. I hope she finds lifelong love and companionship with someone who is capable of independent living. If I were in that situation, I would be extremely firm. I would hear his proposal and agree to discuss it with his parents and make sure he understood that we were leaving but would schedule a future date. Then hope the future would blossom.
You are to be commended for what you do. May you be richly blessed.
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Old 03-27-2013, 11:37 PM   #14
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You are to be commended for what you do. May you be richly blessed.
Thank you.
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Old 03-28-2013, 02:59 AM   #15
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Even a blind squirrel gets a nut now and then. Question is who's the squirrel and who's the nut? Lol
No question in my mind!

Should we conduct and FTF poll

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Old 03-28-2013, 03:13 AM   #16
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No question in my mind!

Should we conduct and FTF poll

Tack
Do it!!!!!!! Lol
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Old 03-28-2013, 03:16 AM   #17
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One of the characteristics of pilots is an almost ritualistic study of other's accident reports. Through such we hope to think through many different scenarios so that when we encounter something similar, we can react faster with an appropriate response. I think there's value to the same idea here.
There's always exceptions to a rule, I'm just extremely anti preconceived notions in general. But any theory has holes when taken in different contexts. ; D
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Old 04-02-2013, 07:47 AM   #18
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From the way the incident was described it isn't clear they were in danger of death or grave bodily harm, much less imminent danger of such. The fact that it was a woman and the threat was a fairly large man does make a difference, that disparity plays in favor of the woman making it more reasonable to consider the threat deadly force even if he was unarmed.

If it was an average, out-of-shape, middle-age father there with his daughter, and the guy didn't have a weapon, he'd be in serious danger of prosecution/indictment if he pulled a gun (i.e., used deadly force.)

All that said, holding you there against your will could be interpreted as kidnapping, and my understanding is you always have the right to protect yourself if someone is attempting to kidnap you.

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Old 04-10-2013, 03:21 PM   #19
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One of our friends has a daughter who is special needs. The daughter is a senior in high school, 19 years old. A few weeks ago, she was at church with a young man who was paying a lot of attention to her. I commented to her that if the guy shows up a church again one of the men should corner him and ask what his intentions are (no father in the picture).

Anyway, we ran into our friend at Walmart yesterday and heard the rest of the story. Turns out the guy is special needs as well, although you wouldn't notice it up front. He was probably 6, 2 and pretty fit. The guy invited mother and daughter over for dinner to meet his mother. Daughter was very excited about the idea. When they got there, his mom was not there. He proceeded to "notify" our friend that he was in love with her daughter and wanted mom to leave daughter with him so they could start their life together... that night. Things went south from there. They essentially had to escape as best they could after getting trapped. Eventually, others in the building helped intervene and the police were called.

Mom and daughter made it home. Daughter got her eyes opened and now wants nothing to do with guy, although it appears she was complicit to some extent in the original plan.

So here's what has been bothering me. I took notice of this kid when I saw him. Had I been in her position, I would have likely drawn on him. However, she was able to get herself and her daughter out of the situation without escalation. Albeit, she is a very experienced foster parent who is used to dealing with troubled and special needs kids.

It really has me wondering, what would have been the right course of action.
It worked out well BUT it is nice to have access to a PPD if it don't!!!!
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Old 04-13-2013, 12:59 AM   #20
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So hard to tell whats going on with special needs kids---the kid could have just been simple-minded and thought he had found his mate and was doing all he could to make it happen---kinda sad story really...
I got to observe a bunch of special needs kids who were put into a "Home" for kids when the parents could not handle them no more. My wife is a pro musician who was part of a band that visited this home for a concert. Really, REALLY sad to see these poor kids trying to understand life and all the growing-up hormones that happens in the early teens. But there were rays of light for some of them. I watched a skinny young guy being picked-on by other less messed-up kids---in a flash his "girlfriend" appeared and was ready to kick their asses---she took him by the hand and led him away while promising death and destruction to those guys if they messed with "her man." I thought it was kinda cute...

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