I agree with everyone else. You should get some good training. I am an IDPA safety officer and competitive shooter. IDPA is supposed to help prepare for a real life self defense scenario. Normal stages start with the gun in the holster loaded with a round in the chamber. That is the safest way. However, you must fully understand safe gun handling before attempting to carry a gun.
The four rules of gun safety are
Treat every gun as if it were loaded.
Finger off the trigger until your sights are on the target.
Know you target and what is behind it.
Never point a gun at anything you are not willing to destroy.
If these rules are new to you...you are not ready to carry.
Romans 1:16 I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile.