I have had the opportunity to shoot many 9mm semi handguns in the past year or so (M&P, SR9, XD9, Stoeger Cougar....), and the one that put the biggest smile on my face was the Stoeger Cougar. This gun has a much lighter recoil then any other 9mm that I have fired. It is "spot-on" accurate, and absolutely no FTF or FTE. For me, this was the winner of all that I have tried.
My advice is to try as many different handguns you can, everyone has a different "feel" for these guns. Some just feel right, while others don't feel right at all in the hand.