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Old 08-13-2012, 04:48 PM   #71
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Originally Posted by dog2000tj View Post
There has been a huge paradigm shift for the application of force in Retail Security. The predominant concept now are to use platoons of trained pigeons, outfitted with the latest stealth enabling body armor and an assortment of sensors/receptors. These platoons give Retail Security Command a force multiplier by being able to come from all directions, thus confusing and overwhelming any would be shoplifter and or terrorist cell.


rest easy folks, shopping is no longer a life threatening endeavor
What about all that pigeon poop or is that their special mace?


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Old 08-14-2012, 04:45 AM   #72
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What about all that pigeon poop or is that their special mace?
it's collected by the F.A.R.T.'s so it can be processed into gunpowder


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Old 08-14-2012, 04:53 AM   #73
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Don't forget to mention the mall security version of the drone...the Stealth Tracking Device. When a shoplifter is identified the drone follows them home and notifies police...so instruct your children not to shoplift, you don't want them coming home from the mall with an STD.

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Old 08-14-2012, 12:31 PM   #74
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I always understood it's not people with malicious intent inside the mall itself that are most dangerous. The real danger is all the oblividiots driving in the parking lot.

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