Are you an Ophiuchus?
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Old 01-14-2011, 10:04 PM   #1
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Default Are you an Ophiuchus?

Are you an Ophiuchus? (OFF-ee-YOO-kuss)


Important life decisions have been made according to horoscopes; jewelry and clothing proclaiming one's sign have been purchased. Lives have been forever altered because someone in a bar didn't like the response they heard when they asked one of the most famous pick-up lines of all time: "Hey baby, what's your sign?" They can't just go and change it!

But they have. Here are the new dates, see if yours is affected:

Capricorn: Jan. 20 – Feb. 16
Aquarius: Feb. 16 – March 11
Pisces: March 11– April 18
Aries: April 18 – May 13
Taurus: May 13 – June 21
Gemini: June 21 – July 20
Cancer: July 20 – Aug. 10
Leo: Aug. 10 – Sept. 16
Virgo: Sept. 16 – Oct. 30
Libra: Oct. 30 – Nov. 23
Scorpio: Nov. 23 – Nov. 29
Ophiuchus: Nov. 29 – Dec. 17
Sagittarius: Dec. 17 – Jan. 20

If you were born between November 29 and December 17, congratulations -- you're an Ophiuchus! What the? Now that our collective minds have been blown and we have to reassess our astrological signs and our personalities, let's figure out who the new kid is on the zodiac.

Is the Ophiuchus man gregarious or brooding? The Ophiuchus woman adventurous or cautious? I'm sure plenty of astrologers will be adjusting their dials to fill us all in, but until the tropical astrologers switch over to the sidereal (or Hindu) method, I'll fill you in on some fun facts about the 13th sign of the zodiac. Including what celebrities fall under the sign of the serpent.



The Ophiuchus constellation is supposed to be a man holding a snake, as seen above. Which is why the other name for Ophiuchus -- which means serpent-bearer -- is Serpentarius (which I think sounds much better). The symbol also looks like a snake wrapped around a pole, not unlike the physician's symbol.

Today's Horoscope (which they say could cover months under the sign -- so buckle your seat belts, Ophiuchus!):

You are trying to escape the routine, dull, and ordinary aspects of your life. You try to find new things that will make your life more exciting and stimulating. But with every effort of this kind, circumstances, duties, and obligations seem to hold you back and keep you stuck in an oppressive situation. You may get to a point where the pressure is unbearable, and then you will make a sudden break for freedom. You may suddenly leave a relationship, an oppressive job, or your place of residence, without warning anyone.

Crazy times ahead for the 13th sign. But you'll be in good company, as these famous folks also fall under the spell of the serpent:

Canebrake
Taylor Swift
Britney Spears
Mark Twain
Ben Stiller
Kirk Douglas
Dick Clark
Woody Allen
Nicki Minaj
Jeff Bridges
Walt Disney
Ozzy Osbourne
Julianne Moore
Harry Reid
Lucy Liu
Margaret Cho
Teri Hatcher
Sinead O'Connor
Dame Judi Dench
John Malkovich
Tom Waits
Felicity Huffman
Kim Basinger
Ann Coulter
Rod Blagojevich
Jennifer Connelly
Frank Sinatra
Jamie Foxx
Steve Buscemi
Mary Todd Lincoln
Vanessa Hudgens
Don Johnson
Ludwig van Beethoven
Benjamin Bratt
Bill Pullman

Are you an Ophiuchus?
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Old 01-14-2011, 10:14 PM   #2
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I refuse to follow this new breakdown of signs, not that it really matters, but I don't want to be a Gemini, I'm staying a Cancer, so there.

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Old 01-14-2011, 10:20 PM   #3
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Originally Posted by Squirrel_Slayer View Post
I refuse to follow this new breakdown of signs, not that it really matters, but I don't want to be a Gemini, I'm staying a Cancer, so there.
Must be an echo in here!

Mrs. Canebrake JUST said the same thing.

At least you can pronounce your new sign.

Mine is Ophiuchus.
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Old 01-14-2011, 10:25 PM   #4
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Thanks Cane, Now I'm totally confused.

I am no longer a Capricorn, but a Sagittarius.

My Better Half, was a Sagittarius, and all I had to wonder was if she would shoot me. Now she is a Ophiuchus (Snake), and I have to figure out if she will still shoot me or bite me.

As it is anyways, she is Herpetophobic.

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Old 01-14-2011, 10:26 PM   #5
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I'm thrilled, my new sign resembles a man with snakes protruding from under his skirt. How many directions can this go?

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Why do you feel it necessary to list your guns?

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Old 01-14-2011, 10:32 PM   #6
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I was born a Taurus and I am staying one. The new sign system can suck it.

Sorry cane.

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Old 01-14-2011, 10:33 PM   #7
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I'm thrilled, my new sign resembles a man with snakes protruding from under his skirt. How many directions can this go?
That's so Freudian!

I like it.

But then........I like snakes.

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Old 01-14-2011, 10:37 PM   #8
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Quote:
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Sorry cane.
It's not my 'effin list.
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Old 01-14-2011, 11:48 PM   #9
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I'm still a Taurus PT51486 Haha see what I did there? No? ....Dang, I'll never be a comedian

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Old 01-15-2011, 12:19 AM   #10
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Been a Taurus all my life ..... going to continue to be a Taurus for the rest of my life!

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