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Stuff You Won't Live Down

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Old 02-14-2009, 03:09 PM   #1
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Default Stuff You Won't Live Down

Bobbyb13 gave me this idea of stuff your significant other won't let you live down. Post your own story.

I was cooking dinner one night when I dropped a bottle of Tabasco on the floor shattering the bottle in an explosion of pepper sauce and glass. Now, I am a Tabasco ADDICT, so we don't keep those tiny bottles of Tabasco in the house...well, that's not entirely true, since I steal them from restaurants that I frequent, but I digress... THIS bottle was one I PAID for and it was one of those large, industrial vats of Tabasco that so make my nipples hard. And it was gone. I wanted to cry.

Since stuff was already sizzling on the stove, I do a haphazard job cleaning up the mess while trying to keep food from burning. Other than bemoaning my loss prior to serving the meal, I forget the whole ordeal and move on with my night.

Later that evening I walked the dog and put the boy to bed and finish my night time errands before crawling off to bed. The wife, much less tired than I decides that perhaps a little Ineffable lovin' is in order and sets the ball in motion, so to speak.

Well, one thing leads to another and he soft, happy sounds turn to HOLY EFFING MOTHER OF GOD WTF???!!!, as she shoots out of bed in a panic for the bathroom. For the life of me, I can't imagine what the hell is wrong with her.

As she sits in the bathroom whimpering, she calls out to me, "Did you forget to wash your hands after cleaning up that Tabasco?!"

I'm like...hell I don't remember... I just had this mess...and the food was going to burn... and then I was....."Oh! Geeze, honey I am so sorry!!"

That was 5 years ago and she still calls me "Tabasco Fingers".

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Old 02-14-2009, 03:20 PM   #2
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I was in the ozarks on a fishing trip. My good friend's wife has a small cabin on the lake, so we stay there and catch what we can.

One morning, I was rather tired, and did not remember to bring the coffee pot. So, I decided I would put a pop-tart in the toaster oven and head down to the water. Came back to retrieve my pop-tart, only to find the smoke alarm going off and everyone shouting at me.

Turns out that I put the pop-tart on a styrafoam plate, and put the whole thing in the toaster oven. The plate melted to the pop-tart, and other parts had melted off and started smoking.

That was about 4 or 5 years ago, and I'm still not allowed in the kitchen at the cabin.

Yup, really gotta have my coffee in the morning.

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Old 02-14-2009, 03:21 PM   #3
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Originally Posted by Ineffable View Post
Now, I am a Tabasco ADDICT
I must also confess that I am a Tabasco addict. +1!!!
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Old 02-14-2009, 03:22 PM   #4
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I almost fell out of my chair I was laughing so hard. I've only been married 9 months, give me a few more years and maybe I'll have something that comes close.
If the pain is lacking so is the discipline...

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Old 02-14-2009, 04:05 PM   #5
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On the weekend my father-in-law and I do yard work and the occasionally carpentry job for people we know. One weekend he couldn't go with me because he was felling a little under the weather so I took my wife since all we had to do was finish cleaning up storm damage, just sticks in the yard. The lady that owns the property likes her yard to be pretty clean, even though she lives in the woods, imagine that.

Her property is rather hilly and is on the banks of her private 30 acre lake. She lets me use her truck because it's 4x4 and mine isn't. One section of the yard we had to clean up was a small meadow on the other side of a tiny babbling creek, with very little water of less than 4 inches and only 2 feet wide, no problem for a 4WD pickup to cross. I get across the creek, pickup all the tree branches and turn the truck to head back across (driving only 3 feet from my original path). The truck sinks to the frame, and is spinning all 4 tires.

Now you're probably asking the same thing my wife asked! What were you doing driving there? Reason 1: I was told to go there by the person paying me and was not told that in the spring time the middle of that meadow is REALLY soft. Reason 2: While picking up sticks, niether me or the wife got any mud on our feet, nor did the ground look soft where we were at the time. It was dry as a bone here put just a few feet over there is was soft.

Anyways the truck sat there until the next week when the field dried out enough that it would pull itself out. Now everytime I drive a truck in grass my wife says, "Don't get stuck!"
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Old 02-15-2009, 01:40 AM   #6
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was making up some electrical gear at work one day which involveds some every large 600 kva wire so i was having to strip the instulation off the wire and it was around 19 degrees that morning and the instulation was real hard and my knife slipped jamming into my leg had to go into the dr. and get 4 stiches. I get back to work about an hour later and was back to doing what i was working on when my forman walks up behind me and tells me the safty rep. is there to do an incident report so dont do anything stupid and just at that moment my knife slips agian slashing my wrist snd sending me back to the dr. for 16 more stiches and this all happened within 2 hours. Till this day I cant pick up a knife at work with out hearing some stupid wise crack .
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Old 02-15-2009, 02:43 AM   #7
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My wife caters and I help her with the events. A couple of years ago we finished up at an out-of-town wedding reception very late. We were driving our full-size van, and towing a 14-foot trailer. When we left, I noticed the fuel hand looked sort of low, but I was sure we would get to a station before you-know-what.

Like I said, it was late (or early, around 1 am) when we left. NO open gas stations in the area we were in, plus it was unfamiliar territory, about 1 1/2 hours from home. D**n! We got out on the interstate, back into "home" country, bur still NO open stations. D**n!! The "uh-oh" was beginning to come to mind.

Well, you can guess what did happen - we ran out of gas on the interstate, 2 o'clock in the morning, AT THE BOTTOM OF THE EXIT RAMP of the exit for the only 24 hour truck stop around. D**n! D**n! D**n! I walked up to the station and they had a 2 1/2 gallon can just for dumb*sses like me. Finally got home around 3 am.

Everytime we pass that ramp she says, "Blow the horn! Say "Hello!" to the spot where you ran out of gas!" and laughs maniacally.

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