State Mythology Series: Virginia
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Old 01-05-2010, 09:59 PM   #1
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Default State Mythology Series: Virginia

1) Best indigenous food: Smithfield Ham DUhhhhh our BBQ is rather good as well.

2) Biggest plus to living there: I get to OPEN carry without a permit or lic. Just strap it on and go walk around town. History Virginia is where something like 90% of the civilwar took place. SO there is lots to see and do all the time. Ground Hogs thats all I have to say.

3) Biggest minus: All the scum suckers from DC live here WONDER WHY.

4) Weirdest wildlife: Hookie bird (Virginia Tech mascot) yes Hookies are castrated male turkeys.

5) A word or phrase that an outsider wouldn't understand: It’s the south pick one there are so many.

6) Local boy or girl who made good: Sandra Bullock, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, get the hint

7) Gun laws: Very easy. You can own and shoot just about anything. If you are former military all you need is $25, DD214 and state paperwork to get a carry permit. If it takes longer than 3 weeks you application is your carry permit till you get the yes or no in the mail.

8) Biggest misconception the rest of us might have about your state: We are not all road kill eating rednecks.

9) The thing an outsider should never do: crash another man deer stand. You may end up in the cooler.

10) Restaurant: In my area Virginia BBQ and a few other places. Carls Ice Cream in Fredericksburg. Come right at sun down and see old cars cruise by as you wait in line for 2 hours to get the best ice cream on the east coast. Capital Ale House If you likky some beer then the Beer menu will blow your socks off here. Capital Alehouse

11) Oddest Laws:
a. It is legal for a man to beat his wife on the courthouse steps so long as it is before 8:00 pm.
b. Not only is it illegal to have sex with the lights on, one may not have sex in any position other than missionary.
c. If one is not married, it is illegal for him to have sexual relations.
d. No one may wash a mule on the sidewalk.
e. It is illegal for a woman to drive a car up Main Street in Waynesboro unless her husband is walking in front of the car waving a red flag.

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Old 01-06-2010, 12:45 AM   #2
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It never occurred to me that Smithfield (Virginia Baked Ham) was actually from Va. Thought it was a brand only or the style in which it was baked.

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Old 01-06-2010, 12:46 AM   #3
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To be called a smithfield ham is has to be cured and packaged within the city limits of Smithfield VA.

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Old 01-06-2010, 12:57 AM   #4
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And I thought I wasn't gonna learn anything today. I've learned quite a bit.

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Old 01-06-2010, 01:37 AM   #5
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How many of the "oddest laws" have you broken?

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Old 01-06-2010, 03:06 AM   #6
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B, C, G

G any sex other vaginal is forbidden.

OOPSIEEEEE.

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Old 01-06-2010, 03:07 AM   #7
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As your attorney, and a fellow Virginian, I advise you not to answer that on the grounds that it ain't nunna his bidness!

And yes, by law, Smithfield Ham must come from within the limits of Smithfield VA. And I'm pretty partial to having it with cornbread made from cornmeal from Mabry Mill, ond the Blue Ridge Parkway.

BTW, deer season in VA runs from November to Jan for much of the state, bag limit 2 a day, 6 per season- but muzzleloader season gives you 2 more. We are shooting Bambi in self defense. By next year, the wild turkeys may overwhelm us.

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Old 01-06-2010, 03:10 AM   #8
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I graduated High School in Virginia, down south around Buggs Island Lake. Great place to Fish.

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Old 01-06-2010, 03:21 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by c3shooter View Post
...... And I'm pretty partial to having it with cornbread made from cornmeal from Mabry Mill, ond the Blue Ridge Parkway.
......
Yeah, I am partial to the buckwheat pancakes there. Grew up a few miles from the mill. Beautiful country!
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Old 01-06-2010, 03:49 AM   #10
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Smithfield hams are the best. Just had one as a matter of fact and it was great.

We have an overabundance of wild turkeys here but as far as I know there is no one running around here castrating them.

We have no DC scum as you put it. As a matter of fact we have no NYC scum as they are too far south of here and would just get lost and scared when they heard the banjo music.

We have our share of rednecks you wouldn't want to mess with.

You can bag 2 deer a day during deer season....OMG...... We are only allowed 1 buck per season and need a doe permit to harvest a doe. Deer are everywhere up here and we have moose too. One wandered into town last summer and ENCON had to tranqualize it and cart it back in the mountains. Same with bear.....only 1 allowed.

The rest of the stuff I reserve comment,

OC

PS......I was kidding about the banjo music.

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