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dango 04-14-2013 04:18 PM

Sprang....!
 
The wife and I decided to test out my legs and new(Exo-Skeleton)..! It,s supposed to keep my head on straight until I heal . What better place to freak people out than....(WAL-MART)..! I love messing with people + the fact , all the "lunkers" in (Span-dex) sporting the trendiest sprang pastels .! Nothing better than 450lbs. Of mauve (Span-Dex) to up one,s libido .! ...Ack..! :confused:

Well , some little lunker , son of much larger lunker ,(in orange (Span-dex) , size ,178...? Well , the little guy gets to looking at me and I see him and go "stone-faced"..! He walks up ands asks , "mister , what's wrong with you..?"
I go to my "Borg" mode and tell him "resistance is futile" ...." I have come in search of food " and grrrrrowll..! :D the little lunker runs to his lunker mother and tries to hind behind her which is no problem , a large , very large mother.!

The mother looks at me in anger and says "what,s your problem"..? At this point , I almost can,t keep my mouth shut .! My mother did raise a polite gentle-man and did teach me not to be rude , BUT........:D I look at the little lunker and really can,t help myself but also , no way can I say what I,m thinking so,s ....
I think of Mom and tell the little lunker , not to worry , I,m on a (DIET)...!

We. Continue our quest to find a bra , which is why we are here and you do not want to take me to the ladies department ever..! I feel the need to try some sexy little things and tend to ask strangers really strange questions.,! Like , does this color clash with my dual-lies..? That would be the discusting drainage tubes with collection bladders hanging out of my back and I swear ,...people got no sense of humor..! :confused: afterI,ve successfully cleared out all departments ,
I wander over on to the sporting goods to gaze upon the empty ammo shelves.!

If ever I own a musket , I can find enough in fishing sinkers to make my own balls , but other than that , nada..!

Auh sprang , the colors , the sizes the feel of being in the middle of a colorful gala of overinflated balloons.....(sigh)...! :D

c3shooter 04-14-2013 04:28 PM

Glad to see you out and about. Be careful with all the pollen flowing around- start a sneezng fit, bend the exoskeleton, and ZIP- yer back with Helga again.

Should have told the little lunker this is what happens when you eat too much junk food.

For your next outing, can I perhaps suggest the local tattoo and body piercing shop? Go look at the folks with the assorted rings and plugs inserted into their anatomy, make sneering remarks about "Amateurs! Hmmphh!" and walk away- leaving them depressed.

winds-of-change 04-14-2013 06:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dango (Post 1213608)
We. Continue our quest to find a bra , which is why we are here and you do not want to take me to the ladies department ever..!

Yeah, I wouldn't take you to the ladies department. I'm afraid you'd want to replace your black bra with a red one, or a zebra striped one.........:D

I want to see a picture of the exoskeleton.

winds-of-change 04-14-2013 06:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by c3shooter (Post 1213616)
For your next outing, can I perhaps suggest the local tattoo and body piercing shop? Go look at the folks with the assorted rings and plugs inserted into their anatomy, make sneering remarks about "Amateurs! Hmmphh!" and walk away- leaving them depressed.

They're already depressed. That's why they do those stupid things.

orangello 04-14-2013 07:09 PM

OK, I'm assuming your head-holder frame may be a lot like the one a buddy in college ended up in after he put just a leeeeeeeetle too much nitrous in his rustang. DO NOT under any circumstances play golf, disc golf, or water sports. It was not pretty at the disc golf course, gotta say; "fore" is not meant to be screamed in the shrill voice of a cat caught in a trash compactor.

dango 04-14-2013 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by orangello (Post 1213775)
OK, I'm assuming your head-holder frame may be a lot like the one a buddy in college ended up in after he put just a leeeeeeeetle too much nitrous in his rustang. DO NOT under any circumstances play golf, disc golf, or water sports. It was not pretty at the disc golf course, gotta say; "fore" is not meant to be screamed in the shrill voice of a cat caught in a trash compactor.

Well , I,m kind-a looking like a trash compactor..! :D Only for about 4 weeks and then back to my ole self . Now I never got any ink ,piercing s or anything like that..! Why mess with perfection..? I love good art and love the work of a good tattoo , but I was never one to follow the crowd . I got scars and that,s enough.!

Chainfire 04-14-2013 11:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dango (Post 1213960)
Well , I,m kind-a looking like a trash compactor..! :D Only for about 4 weeks and then back to my ole self . Now I never got any ink ,piercing s or anything like that..! Why mess with perfection..? I love good art and love the work of a good tattoo , but I was never one to follow the crowd . I got scars and that,s enough.!

I have been away for a while and don't know what happened to you. Did you get hung or something?:)

dango 04-14-2013 11:44 PM

Not hung yet , but a few people in my past might would have liked that..! :D

And what happened to me ? Man against nature and I lost , Eeeek..! French kissed the side of a mountain..!

eatmydust 04-14-2013 11:51 PM

5 Attachment(s)
If I come across you @ Wallyworld, I promise not to look at you any weirder than I look @ some of the folks I see hauntin' that place.

Scouts honor (fingers crossed behind my back).

dango 04-14-2013 11:57 PM

Pa. Huh..? Would that be North West Pa. .? :confused: like Clarion County.?
You might see me ...!


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