Sarge and Lt. Linda- the 2nd Date
When we left SAGA #1 Linda had bowed to the flattery of Sarge and promised to go on another date with him.
"So Sarge, where are we going on our date?" asks Linda.
"How about a rendezvous" replies Sarge.
Now folks you have to remember that before Linda married Sarge and became Lt Linda she was just a poor little Alabama girl.from Birmingham, Alabama. For those that don't know, in Alabama a High School Diploma is an attendence certificate.They are just so happy that you showed up for 12 years that they give you one. (Diploma) So when Sarge starts using 50 cent College words on little Linda she is lost. She thought a "rendezvous" was a romantic interlude. True she was a little puzzled when he insisted that she wear her Bicentenial costume with the little country grandma poke bonnet, but it didn't sound too kinky. Not like leather and chains so she agreed.
The next Saturday morning Sarge arrives with the White Elephant (Sarge's 1974 Ford Van) and knockity knocks on her door. Unfortunately Sarge has forgotten to tell little Linda that he will be in his costume too. She opens the door and there on her door step stands a full dress Indian. Leggins, breach clothe, long black hair, feathers, scalp locks on his shirt and war paint. She slams the door in his face.
Frighted she peers out the side of the curtain. The savage is calling her NAME!
"Hey Linda, Do we got a date or not?" (guys note how Sarge takes this temporary setback in stride and quickly takes command of the situation by falling on his knees and begging.)
Finally through his well developed powers of persuasion Sarge convinces Linda to open the door. When she does her little dog Lady runs out and bites Sarge on the leg.
With Lady tugging on Sarges moccasin he rallys and uses all his charm to convince little Linda of the wonderful time they will have at the rendezvous.
*A note here for those who by accident of birth or location do not know what a rendezvous is. A rendezvious is a recreation of a 17th century mountain man trading festivel. (rendezvous) and all the actors (attendees) wear mountain man or Indian costumes. Shooting matches and tomahawk and knife throwing contests go on all day. At night the tepees and Baker canvass tents are lit up with candles and buffalo fat lamps. It is like stepping back in history
Overcoming the difficulty of driving the White Elephant with a small dog attached to his ankle Sarge and Linda arrive at the mountain valley and walk up the path to the village. Here the muzzle loading rifle contests are in full swing. Little Linda asks Sarge what he is going to do next. Sarge quickly takes comand of the situation and replies "You mean what are WE going to do next." and hands her the small 45 cal. muzzle loader he had brought for her. Linda seeing him pull a gun on her, reacts instinctively and grabs the rifle, executing a perfect vertical butt stroke between Sarge's legs dropping him to his knees. As he hits the ground he moans that he has entered her in the women's Division shooting contest.
An hour later Sarge has recovered and little Linda has met other women shooters and is having a ball. She also has out-shot Sarge every which way but loose. As the day grows to dusk the reluctant end on the first date occurs and Sarge and Linda return to her humble home. Little Linda had such a terrific time that she invites Sarge in for a night cap and shyly indicates that he might wish to stay for a while.(Sarge is going to score!)
But it is not to be. By the time they get Lady the dog unattached from Sarges ankle he is pooped and still walking with difficulty from that vertical butt stroke earlier in the day.
So he smiles, lightly kisses her hand, kicks the dog, and takes his leave.
(guys this is the way to get them thinking you are only interested in their mind not their body, passing up a sure thing like this)
SAGA # 3 coming "Sarge gets serious"