Sarge falls off the Hoover Dam
Sarge falls off Hoover Dam
For those that missed the first saga (# 50) Sarge and Lt. Linda are at Las Vegas for the prestige annual SHOT Show. (Shooting and Hunting Outdoor Trade Show). After getting lost several times (it was all Lt. Lindaís fault) Sarge spent all day Friday and all day Saturday at the convention hall. So today is Sunday and Sarge, being the good, generous and loving husband he is, tells Lt. Linda that Sunday is her day. Where ever she wants to go or do, it is her day.
"Oh great, Sarge." Lt. Linda said happily, "I have been wanting to go to see Hoover Dam, lets go." She bubbled.
"A dam?" Sarge questioned, "We got lots of dams in Colorado, why do you want to go see a dam? You see one dam and you have seen them all."
"Not this dam Sarge, this is the marvel of the world, the biggest damn dam in the United States and you will enjoy it I know." She stated.
"Well Sarge knows that it is futile to argue with the good wife when she has her mind set on anything, and maybe the biggest dam would be something to see, so he smiles and puts on his coat and bows to his lovely wife, "After you darling" he murmurs.
"OK Linda how do we get to the dam?" questions Sarge.
"I had a pamphlet here somewhere; she rummages around in her purse.
"Here we go again," moans Sarge
"But after a few detours and several turn a roundís there appeared a sign stating HOOVER DAM ahead. By now we are up in the mountains and the scenery is fabulous, (not as good as Colorado but not bad) and we round a turn in the road and there is a deep deep canyon we are looking down. Up on one end the Hoover Dam sits, a half circle of concrete that plugs this deep canyon as effectively as a concrete glacier. But everywhere you look there are people. Tourists of all sizes and shapes (mostly out of shapes) and all the parking lots are full. After cruising 4 lots and finding nothing empty Linda suggests we go over the dam and see if there is parking on the other side. No luck, we keep driving. Finally we see a sign that says "Welcome to Arizona." And as luck would have it Arizona is nothing but a big parking lot. We easily find a parking spot and then began the long walk back to the dam. (I did mention that Sarge and Lt. Linda is in excellent shape as all soldiers are)
The dam is interesting and the tour is well done and Sarge is enjoying himself. After the tour the two soldiers wander around the complex and Sarge notices long sets of beautiful stairways leading up the side of the mountain.
"I wonder what is up there, Linda?" Sarge questions. "It sure is a beautiful stair way."
"Must be part of the tour." Linda says, "Letís go up and see."
"Good thing we are in excellent physical condition Lt. or we would never make it up this steep a set of stairs." Sarge huffed and puffed. "Just 4 more flights to go too."
Finally they arrive at the top, and there before their unbelieving eyes isÖÖÖÖ. A parking lot.
"Linda I canít believe we climbed all those stairs just to tour a parking lot." Sarge wheezed and puffed.
"It was your idea." She gasped and fought for breath.
"If I had enough air in my lungs I would laugh, but I will have to save it for breathing and surviving." Sarge huffed.
"Donít forget we have to walk all the way back to Arizona to get the car." Linda reminded him.
"Yeah maybe we can hitch hike, you got pretty legs." Sarge suggested.
So finally the two warriors catch their breath and head down and across the dam to the Arizona parking lot. As they approach the end of the Dam Sarge steps off the concrete and DOWN he goes. The curb was not a curb but a long step about a foot deep and no signs to warn him.
Being a superb athlete and always in excellent condition he flips in mid air and falls on his side instead of face first. Executing a Karate back arm to spread the force of the fall over his whole side he rolls to his feet.
"You OK?" Lt. Linda runs over to him and checks for blood and cuts.
"Of course dear," Sarge moans, and sinks against the railing. "I just need a little time to get my breath. About a day or two ought to do it.
"We better get an ambulance up here and get you to the hospital, soldier." She orders.
"No no, I am OK, I have been shot before and it didnít stop me, just give me a little time to work the kinks out." Sarge says.
Finally Sarge is able to hobble a little and they head to the parking lot. Actually the walk did him good as it allowed his circulation to pump fresh blood to the injury and keep it from turning to a big black and blue bruise. Finally they got back to the car and headed to their hotel.
"You think you can make it to the elevator." Asks Lt. Linda.
"Naaa Iíll just sleep down here honey. Give me a hand and once I am on my feet lean me toward the door." Sarge suggests. A half an hour later a limping Sarge makes the elevator door and on to their room.
"You better lay down and rest, husband." States Lt. Linda the nurse.
"OK miss nursey, why donít you take all your clothes off and rest with me?" jokes Sarge.
"Sounds like you are a big faker to me," she playfully slaps him on the hip.
"Ohhh." Sarge moans "Wrong side honey Wrong side. Forget about the playing."
And that was just the third day of a 5 day trip. Will Sarge last long enough to make it home to Colorado? Will he get lost again? Silly questions.
The end of this one
If a man strikes you on the cheek
Being a Christian the only thing you can do
Is to help him up off the ground.