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Old 06-22-2012, 02:39 PM   #31
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Originally Posted by PrimePorkchop View Post
This is going to be the typical guy/girl paradox, but more here's a top 20 list, numbered in order of importance.

1. If you think you are fat, you probably are. Do not ask us. We refuse to answer.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

1. Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair.

1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

1. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as custom trigger jobs, the shotgun formation, and kinky sex

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

1. You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!

1. No, we do not know what day it is. We never will. We remember dates like you remember to change the oil in your car or check your tire pressure. Mark anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your hand bag?

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done, not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
Quoted to add emphasis.

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OK, my pet peeve is stupidity (not ignorance) that i failed to notice early enough in the relationship. Stupid women get boring REALLY quickly. Another pet peeve is the "pretend dummy" who thinks it makes her more attractive to not know how to do some things (kinda the flipside).
Worst of all is behind-the-back manipulation; for good ends or not, manipulating someone you are intimate with is not cool, no matter what her mother taught her. I am a grown-up; deal with me as such or GTFO.
Apparently my Ex isn't unique.

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He will fall asleep watching TV at 6:00 and then expect to play video games all night. If you can't stay awake during "my time", you don't need to be up playing video games......you obviously need to go to bed early.
Not to seem impertinent, but I think I would be a bit upset if my significant other went on this forum to complain about our relationship or to criticize my habits. This stuff needs to be settled out of the public eye.
Remember, things could always be worse. He's gainfully employed & law abiding (being a gun owner & such.) If he were a drunken abuser, then you'd have real problems. This counts as a simple annoyance.
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Old 06-22-2012, 02:50 PM   #32
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Originally Posted by cvia
My pet peeve is if the tooth paste isn't rolled back up to the top. Kind of like having your pistol cocked and locked. It has to be ready when I pick it up. As to video games, I like playing when I get the chance. I have a 2 years daughter and the wife works different hours then I do so when we do get a day with one another no games are aloud. I tend to play when the house is asleep. Lots of coffee and monsters to counter the effect lol!
We use different toothpaste because he said mine is gross, so we're all good there.
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Old 06-22-2012, 02:54 PM   #33
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My pet peeve is the female voice box. It's generally full of cryptic blather and harsh, demonic tones that has a never ending energy supply. I may come out of retirement for a cutie with a non functioning squawk box.

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Old 06-22-2012, 03:59 PM   #34
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Originally Posted by PrimePorkchop View Post
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
Just this week my wife, oldest daughter, and I were in home depot buying paint for her new home. Daughter says "do you like {insert tan 1 here} or {insert tan 2 here} for my bedroom?"

"I don't do colors, I build stuff, I fix things, I don't do colors, and besides wth hell are {tan 1} and {tan 2}, they are the same washed out brown." Paint mixing guy was struggling to avoid loosing it
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Old 06-22-2012, 04:25 PM   #35
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Originally Posted by orangello View Post
That is a good girl!


OK, my pet peeve is stupidity (not ignorance) that i failed to notice early enough in the relationship. Stupid women get boring REALLY quickly. Another pet peeve is the "pretend dummy" who thinks it makes her more attractive to not know how to do some things (kinda the flipside).

Worst of all is behind-the-back manipulation; for good ends or not, manipulating someone you are intimate with is not cool, no matter what her mother taught her. I am a grown-up; deal with me as such or GTFO.
On the other hand, I don't think men like women who are independent and self sufficient.
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Old 06-22-2012, 04:30 PM   #36
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My wife squeezes the toothpaste from the middle instead of from the end, it drives me up the wall.

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Old 06-22-2012, 04:33 PM   #37
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Quote:
Originally Posted by winds-of-change

On the other hand, I don't think men like women who are independent and self sufficient.
My wife is very independent. I think men mainly hate being controlled by independent woman. I know that not all independent women are that way, hence my wife.
Also it could be an inferiority complex in the male that pushes him away. I like the way my wife is, ain't gotta hold her hand to show her how to do stuff.
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Old 06-22-2012, 04:34 PM   #38
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Originally Posted by levelcross

As a former welder I understand the hot and tired aspect....but can there be a medical reason for the naps? Sleep Apnea is hard for him to figure out, if he holds his breath or just stops breathing while he sleeps have a sleep survey done and get it fixed fast. I feel it saved my life.

Now up on my soap box I go. I hate when we are going somewhere and she waits until 50 minutes before we HAVE to leave to start getting ready knowing it will take 1-1/2 hrs for her to go thru the routine and walk out the door.

If she wants to go somewhere she can do it in 45 minutes...what the

Another one is one that I do not have a problem with as this was a deal breaker while dating, that is trying to change me. I am pretty much face value, what you see is what you get, every day all day. If you don't like it OH well Buh-Bye.
He actually just did a sleep study and knows that he will be getting a CPAP machine. I can't wait because he scares me at night when he's not breathing. About the getting ready to leave part.......he does that too but it usually involves him having to take a poop. Haha
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Old 06-22-2012, 04:38 PM   #39
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Oh I gotta say been married 10 years to my high school sweetheart dating 7 years before that (had to make sure, I don't take marriage lightly), been through all the crap, fights, disagreements, but have a great marriage.
So I think my biggest peev now would be the dreaded " what do you want for dinner" debate, I say one thing she'll say nooo, I say another, ,still noooo, Why even ask me, I'm 6'2" 260#, clearly I'll eat just about anything! Just cut the bs and just tell me what's for dinner!
I'm not picky, I'm hungry,,do we have to have the same moth@#$&&*ing conversation EVERY NIGHT??????? ok just breath, just breath....
Other than that life is sweet.

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Old 06-22-2012, 04:38 PM   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Overkill0084

Quoted to add emphasis.

Apparently my Ex isn't unique.

Not to seem impertinent, but I think I would be a bit upset if my significant other went on this forum to complain about our relationship or to criticize my habits. This stuff needs to be settled out of the public eye.
Remember, things could always be worse. He's gainfully employed & law abiding (being a gun owner & such.) If he were a drunken abuser, then you'd have real problems. This counts as a simple annoyance.
My husband is on here and knows that I started this as a joke. He is my best friend and a terrific man. We just mess with each other. It's all in good fun.
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