W-O-C, have run across her some years back. Before she got married, her surname was Dah-meh-nah. Just call her Miss.
As far as the inmate, send him a sheet of 60 grit sandpaper, tell him to reshape things as he sees fit.
I used to get to see a lot of the suits filed by prison inmates here in Virginia. Some are a HOOT! I still recall on that claimed his freedom of religion was being violated, as HIS religion required that he eat steak at least 4 times each week, and the prison kitchen was not coming through for him.