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Old 12-25-2013, 11:48 PM   #1
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Default Perhaps this should posted in 'Conspiracy'?

A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport this morning as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a press conference just before noon today, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. Although he did not identify the man, he confirmed the man has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

“Al-Gebra is a problem for us”, the Attorney General said. “They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names like ‘X’ and ‘Y’ and refer to themselves as ‘unknowns’ but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philosopher Isosceles used to say, ‘There are 3 sides to every triangle.’” The Attorney General went on to say “Teaching our children sentient thought processes and equipping them to solve problems is dangerous and puts our government at risk.”

Sources: Daily Paul



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Old 12-25-2013, 11:55 PM   #2
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Cute! Reminds me of the constipated engineer who worked it out the problem with a slide rule.



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Old 12-26-2013, 01:29 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vincine View Post
A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport this morning as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a press conference just before noon today, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. Although he did not identify the man, he confirmed the man has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

“Al-Gebra is a problem for us”, the Attorney General said. “They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names like ‘X’ and ‘Y’ and refer to themselves as ‘unknowns’ but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philosopher Isosceles used to say, ‘There are 3 sides to every triangle.’” The Attorney General went on to say “Teaching our children sentient thought processes and equipping them to solve problems is dangerous and puts our government at risk.”

Sources: Daily Paul
That was funny on so many levels!

And I was about to add a really bad pun, and now I'm so glad I was able to resist.
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Old 12-26-2013, 01:58 AM   #4
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You need to see a doctor and have them lance that abscissa for you......

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Old 12-26-2013, 09:57 PM   #5
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That's an acute angle you have on that story... Haha....ewww bad pun



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