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Old 03-05-2014, 09:47 PM   #11
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I never had kids. Probably the smartest lifestyle choice I ever made, over careers, women, everything!

I know it's not for everyone but for me it was the right choice, even though it cost me a marriage in my twenties.
Trust me, you made the right choice. Having kids is NOT something you should be talked into, coerced into, guilted into, any of that. If you don't WANT kids, then you don't need kids. I totally respect your decision and choice to not have any.
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Old 03-05-2014, 10:05 PM   #12
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I have a 24 year old daughter a 15 year old son and a 28 year old step daughter. I also have grand children. I have never been afraid to spank my children. A swat on the butt is not abuse. Children need to have boundaries. You do not spank teenagers. That stops when they become able to truly understand the consequences of their actions. You will know when the XBOX or PS4 is more effective than a spanking. The day before yesterday my son decided to be disrespectful and run his mouth a little. My wife simply told him that he was done playing XBOX for the rest of the night and the next day. He immediately shut his mouth. The XBOX is his life! The rest of the night and most of the next day he was the nicest teenager you ever met. She let him play a few hours before bed on that second night. So he got out early for good behavior.

And always remember...pick your battles. There will be plenty of important issues. Ignore the stupid ones. Never allow disrespect.

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Old 03-05-2014, 10:11 PM   #13
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Negative on ANY state programs and hesitant on the docs '' long story '' .
I think both are fine as when they are not throwing fits they are well spoken and smart , HE does not know how to handle the word no .
SHE is just a idiot sometimes
The other night she got on the table at 12:30 and just pissed , pants off , pull ups off . Just baffled me .
Both were potty trained but she has regressed some for some stupid reason .
He is VERY VERY VERY picky about what he eats and wears , if its slightly different he wont have it . Almost like he is MAJOR OCD , everything has to be a certain way . I have to set the tv remote down in a certain spot or he will go off.
Also going through that dreaded '' IM SCARED'' stage , like , of what ? its the middle of the day and all the lights are on ?

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Old 03-05-2014, 10:16 PM   #14
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Trust me, you made the right choice. Having kids is NOT something you should be talked into, coerced into, guilted into, any of that. If you don't WANT kids, then you don't need kids. I totally respect your decision and choice to not have any.
There is a lot of that, your own parents strongly inquire WHEN ARE YOU going to have kids, also your friends, coworkers, everyone. A surprising amount of pressure though it's usually subtle. And even though I'd had a vasectomy at 28, before I got married, my wife's internal clock began ticking and she couldn't live a childless life so there was no option except divorce, fortunately amicable.
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Old 03-05-2014, 10:20 PM   #15
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MM I also have twin boy and girl they are 2yr and 3mo then we also have a 6mo old. I know a thing or to about being overwhelmed and stressed to the max lol. But over all I must say that my wife and I have pretty good kids. She is a stay at home super mom. I've noticed that my mood kind of sets the tone when I get home from work. If I come home mad at the world they all sense it and the rest of the night is shot. But if I came home kiss the wife then give each kid their own one on one time the rest of the night is awesome. Having kids is probably my greatest accomplishment. My twins are completely different from each other in looks and attitude. He is a mini me and she is a miniature version of her mom. My 6mo is a boy also and he looks like both of us. It's pretty cool how it all worked out.

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Old 03-05-2014, 11:43 PM   #16
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my best advice to date:

marry an amazing woman.

love your children more than yourself.

it hurts to discipline your kids, but if you don't discipline them, you are REALLY hurting them.

love is spelled T-I-M-E to a small child. spending time with your kids is the best thing you never have to buy them.

when you have an infant, check out the book "baby wise" and follow it to a tee....IF you like sleeping.

WTH do i know? i'm still trying to figure it out!

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Old 03-06-2014, 02:27 AM   #17
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This is all I got to say on parenting................Proverbs 13:24.

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Old 03-06-2014, 02:58 AM   #18
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Raised 1 daughter. Honors Student through school. Graduated with

honors from college.

1. Your children WILL have your attention. GIVE it to them, or they

will take it.

2. Carry them as often as you can. You build a strong bond, and the day

will come, only too soon, when you can carry them no more.

3. Frozen Eggo Waffles work great when they are teething.

4. A set bedtime ritual, like a story, makes them much more likely

to get to sleep on time.

5. "Discipline", like "diet", is a noun, not a verb...

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Old 03-06-2014, 01:16 PM   #19
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The worst punishment for a child is no punishment at all .
Me and the wife often call them out and with a bit of reverse psychology get them to listen . My wife is way more stressed over them than I am but my mom was the same way , hell I have a few scars where she threw something and hit me but when it comes time to get their attention when their bad , more so him , I usually have to pick him up and , not really body slamm but I put him on his back on the sofa or bed , pin him down and when he calms down a bit I explain to him what he did wrong .
It just seems like we cant get anywhere with them over their tempers .
Both are trying to be independent , even cooking their own food but when we wont let them use a hot stove or when they cant figure it out they just loose thier minds .
Our biggest task right now boils down to tempers and patience


Had my mom not been sick and dying we would have waited about a year to have kids . Cant say if we were really ready to have to kids but we got married so mom could be there then started on kids right away just to have her die 3 months before . There is no regrets on having them but the whole thing in a certain way turned into a epic Greek tragedy . Whole reason we rushed into it was for her to have grandkids before she died

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Old 03-06-2014, 01:34 PM   #20
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---Try not to "babysit". Get involved in what they are doing,

or, better yet, get them involved in what you are

doing.

Case in point:-"A Tale of Two Supermarkets"

My Ex and her friend went to the supermarket and took

my daughter along. They had a terrible time, couldn't handle

my daughter-"she destroyed the place", etc.

The next week they thought it would be funny to saddle me

with my daughter on a supermarket trip. I gave my daughter

a role to play, picking things out, organizing the cart, catching

things as I threw them to her (NOT cans, DUH) and helping in

general. OKAY, as we were playing "dragster", things might have

gotten a little out of hand by "fourth gear", (running full blast down

aisle #2, almost had a collision) but the point is I paid attention

to her, rather than a bunch of inanimate food packages, and

we had a great time.

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