JOKE !! "Why I Fired My Secretary"
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JOKE !! "Why I Fired My Secretary"

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Old 10-07-2008, 07:25 AM   #1
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Default JOKE !! "Why I Fired My Secretary"

Why I Fired My Secretary

Last week was my birthday
and I didn't feel very well
waking up on that morning.

I went downstairs for breakfast
hoping my wife would be pleasant
and say, 'Happy Birthday!', and
possibly have a small present for me.

As it turned out,
she barely said good morning,
let alone 'Happy Birthday.'

I thought...
Well, that's marriage for you,
but the kids....
They will remember.

My kids came bounding down stairs to
breakfast and didn't say a word.
So when I left for the office,
I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office,
my secretary Jane said,
'Good Morning Boss,
and by the way Happy Birthday! '
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock,
when Jane knocked on my door
and said, 'You know,
It's such a beautiful day outside,
and it is your Birthday,
what do you say we go out to lunch,
just you and me.'
I said, 'Thanks, Jane,
that's the greatest thing
I've heard all day.
Let's go!'

We went to lunch.
But we didn't go
where we normally would go.
She chose instead a quiet bistro
with a private table.
We had two martinis each
and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office,
Jane said, 'You know,
It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We ?'

I responded,
'I guess not. What do you have in mind?'
She said, 'Let's drop by my apartment,
it's just around the corner.'

After arriving at her apartment,
Jane turned to me and said,
" Boss, if you don't mind,
I'm going to step into the bedroom
for just a moment.
I'll be right back."
"Ok," I nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and,
after a couple of minutes,
she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ..
Followed by my wife, my kids,
and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing 'Happy Birthday.

And I just sat there...

On the couch...


LMAO !!! That's the hard way to find out how the word ASSUME breaks down .
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Old 10-07-2008, 12:13 PM   #2
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Great way to start the day, thanks for the laugh!
"I'm your brother, just make it count."
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Old 10-07-2008, 12:54 PM   #3
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I lol'ed
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Old 10-09-2008, 06:20 AM   #4
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Where did you get that information........ I never told a soul!
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing"
Edmund Burke

"We must indeed hang together or assuredly we will all hang seperately."
Ben Franklin

"Those who would make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable."
John F. Kennedy

"They that can give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."
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Old 10-09-2008, 07:19 AM   #5
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awesome bwahahaha
‘‘We, the People are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts — not to overthrow the Constitution, but to overthrow men who pervert the Constitution.’’
— Abraham Lincoln

"Rosie O'Donnell blames guns for murders, but nobody blames spoons and forks for Rosie O'Donnell"
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Old 10-24-2008, 10:53 PM   #6
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to good LOL
[The odds are always 50/50
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Old 10-31-2008, 06:43 PM   #7
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that is funny my wifes name is jane , i just faxed it to her office.
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