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Old 10-17-2010, 08:07 PM   #31
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Default F b i

The phone rings at the FBI headquarters. "Hello"? - Hello,is this the FBI...Yes what can I do for you?... I'm calling to report my neighbor jack frost,He's hiding marijuana inside his firewood...Thank you very much for the call,sir...The next day,the FBI agents descend on jack frost's house.they search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes ,they bust open every piece of firewood,but find no marijuana. they leave. ..The phone rings at jack frost's house..."HEY"! did they chop your firewood?..."YEP" Great,now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed!!!... know body got any good jokes or what???

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Old 10-17-2010, 09:40 PM   #32
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O.K. Let me prefaced this with the fact that my lady friend form Arkansas told me this one.

If a man and woman get married in Arkansas and get divorced in Texas, would they still be brother and sister?

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Old 10-17-2010, 09:44 PM   #33
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Old 10-17-2010, 11:22 PM   #34
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That's brutal.

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Old 10-18-2010, 02:29 AM   #35
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What do you call a skeleton in the closet with blonde hair?...Last years hide-in-seek winner...What's the difference between a smart blonde and BIGFOOT?...BIGFOOT has been seen...

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Old 10-20-2010, 03:39 PM   #36
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What did the doe say when she came running out of the woods?...I'll never do that for two bucks again...What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?...one less drunk...What do pink floyd and Dale Earnheart have in common?...Their last Big hit was the wall...ouch!!!

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Old 10-22-2010, 06:38 PM   #37
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What does it mean when the flag at the post office is flying at half mast?...They're hiring... How do you make your girlfriend scream while having sex?...call her and tell her...

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Old 10-28-2010, 03:21 PM   #38
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Default 5 signs you might be a redneck...

5-SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK...you take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree...you can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a flyswatter...the salvation army declined your mattress...you have the local taxidermist on speed dial...you consider fast food hitting a deer at 65 MPH...

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Old 10-31-2010, 05:23 AM   #39
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What kind of dog does DRACULA have?...A Bloodhound...What do ghosts drink?...Evaporated milk...What does a vampire fear most?...tooth decay...What do you call count DRACULA'S cookout?...vampire campfire...How do you keep a skeleton from laughing?...take away his funny bone...HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!...

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Old 11-01-2010, 08:32 AM   #40
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Default Bird dog

Buddy tells his friend that he and his new bird dog can basically talk to each other.Friend says ,right,prove it. So buddy points to some bushes and his dog runs over,sniffs around,then returns and barks six times. Buddy says,there are six birds in those bushes. Prove it says his friend. Buddy takes a shot in the air and sure enough,six birds come flying out. That's great ,says the friend,can I try that. Sure says buddy,so the friend points to some bushes and off goes the dog. This time the dog is gone for awhile,when he finally returns,he runs up to buddy's friend and starts pumping his leg. Get this crazy dog off me. The dog stops and picks up a stick in his mouth and starts shaking it back and forth, You've got one crazy dog buddy. You and that dog can't talk. Sure we can,he's telling me that there are more f##king birds in there than you could shake a stick at!!!...

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