Jeff Foxworthy in Kabul
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Old 12-24-2009, 04:08 PM   #1
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Default Jeff Foxworthy in Kabul

I "acquisitioned" this off one of my military forums to share here.


Jeff "Don't call me Mohammad" Foxworthy sez: what's your fave?

Personally I'm leaning toward #10 but #1 and #4 are hard to beat.....


"YOU MIGHT BE A TALIBAN IF..."


1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.


2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.


3. You have more wives than teeth.


4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon "unclean."


5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.


6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.


7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.


8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.


9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.


10. You've always had a crush on your neighbor's goat.


ALSO......


Maxine on Towel Heads

"TOWEL HEADS"


Recently I received a warning about the use of this politically incorrect term, so please note: We all need to be more sensitive in our choice of words. I have been informed that the Islamic terrorists, who hate our guts and want to kill us, do not like to be called "Towel Heads" since the item they wear on their heads is not actually a towel, but in fact, a small folded sheet. Therefore, from this point forward, please refer to them as "Little Sheet Heads"

Thank you for your support and compliance on this delicate matter.


Jack

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Last edited by IGETEVEN; 12-24-2009 at 04:16 PM. Reason: Additional information
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Old 12-24-2009, 04:37 PM   #2
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Numbah one!
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Old 12-24-2009, 04:44 PM   #3
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i like number 2 personally

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Old 12-24-2009, 05:36 PM   #4
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My vote goes to #1

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Old 12-24-2009, 06:00 PM   #5
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I like #5 myself.

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Old 12-24-2009, 09:10 PM   #6
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I like #4.

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Old 12-24-2009, 09:43 PM   #7
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Damn... They were all so good

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Old 12-24-2009, 09:44 PM   #8
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Number 8.

Some of the Taliban still doesn't know that though.

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Old 12-25-2009, 12:28 AM   #9
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That list is full of win!

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