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Bigcountry02 09-08-2009 08:53 PM

Happy Time!
Kick Me Int The Ass!

Katie Couric, Charlie Gibson, Brian Williams and a tough old U.S. Marine
Sergeant were captured by terrorists in Iraq . The leader of the terrorists
told them he'd grant each of them one last request before they were beheaded
and dragged naked through the streets.

Katie Couric said, 'Well, I'm a Southerner, so I'd like one last plate of
fried chicken.'

The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the chicken.
Couric ate it all and said, 'Now I can die content.'
Charlie Gibson said, 'I'm living in ' New York , so I'd like to hear the song,
The Moon and Me, one last time.'
The terrorist leader nodded to another terrorist who had studied the Western
world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag musicians and played
the song.

Gibson was satisfied.

Brian Williams said, 'I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape
recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe,
someday, someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end.'

The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Williams
dictated his comments.

He then said, 'Now I can die happy.'

The leader turned and said, 'And now, Mr.. U.S. Marine, what is your final

'Kick me in the ass,' said the Marine.

'What?' asked the leader, 'Will you mock us in your last hour?'
'No, I'm NOT kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass,' insisted the Marine.
So the leader shoved him into the yard and kicked him in the ass.

The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from
inside his cammies and shot the leader dead.

In the resulting confusion, he emptied his sidearm on six terrorists, then
with his knife he slashed the throat of one, and with an AK-47, which he took,
sprayed the rest of the terrorists killing another 11.

In a flash, all of them were either dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the Marine was untying Couric, Gibson, and Williams, they asked him, 'Why
didn't you just shoot them all in the first place? Why did you ask him to
kick you in the ass?'

'What?' replied the Marine, 'and have you three ass holes report that I was
the aggressor.....?

Semper Fi!

BigByrd47119 09-08-2009 09:03 PM

LOL thats a good one!

user4 09-08-2009 09:07 PM

Ha. Nice. I shall move it to the appropriate forum

Dillinger 09-08-2009 10:13 PM

LOL - That's awesome. Got to love Uncle Sam's Misguided Children, they always bring the lulz. :D


bonras 09-08-2009 10:38 PM

Thats great! And how true it would be!

Moss99 09-08-2009 10:41 PM

What kind of Marine carries a 9mm?

Aww nuts, i'm going to get it for that comment...

CA357 09-09-2009 12:06 AM

Are you sure it wasn't a 1911A1 Colt? :D

spittinfire 09-09-2009 11:43 AM


Originally Posted by Moss99 (Post 157053)
What kind of Marine carries a 9mm?

Aww nuts, i'm going to get it for that comment...

Yes you are......

Good one bigcountry!

WDB 09-10-2009 01:27 AM

Good one, thanks for the grin.

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