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Halloween Story


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Old 10-24-2011, 09:49 PM   #1
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Police work must be entertaining as well as dangerous.

In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, 22 year old white male, in a pumpkin patch 12.01 a.m. on Friday. On Monday, at the Gwinnett County (GA) courthouse, Lawrence was charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public Intoxication. The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way home from a drinking session when he decided to stop, "You know how a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around for miles or at least I thought there wasn't anyone around," he stated in a telephone interview. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purpose, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged need. "Guess I was really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process of doing the deed, Lawrence failed to notice an approaching police car and was unaware of his audience until Officer Brenda Taylor approached him. "It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said Officer Taylor. "I walked up to Lawrence and he's just banging away at this pumpkin." Officer Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence. "I said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you're having sex with a pumpkin?' He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then he looked me straight in the face and said, "A pumpkin? ****...is it midnight already?"


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Old 10-24-2011, 09:52 PM   #2
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I've heard this before, I think it's real.
No matter though, even if it's just a story, it's still funny.
I think it's real, only because I've walked in on someone with a cantaloup. So I know there are those that will do such a thing.


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Old 10-24-2011, 09:58 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trip286 View Post
I've heard this before, I think it's real.
No matter though, even if it's just a story, it's still funny.
I think it's real, only because I've walked in on someone with a cantaloup. So I know there are those that will do such a thing.
It's not real, but it's funny as hell! Sorry for your cantaloup experience though, that's a bad thing to walk in on.
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Old 10-24-2011, 10:01 PM   #4
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I haven't eaten a cantaloup since then... but every now and then, I call the guy just so I can say "remember when..."
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Old 10-24-2011, 10:17 PM   #5
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snopes.com: Sex with a Pumpkin

This incident wasn't for real, but there was one with an arrest.

Warm watermelon FTW!


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