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Old 04-11-2012, 05:26 AM   #11
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Reminds me of the time i was on patrol at the mall of america when we were ambushed by osama bin ladens alpha assassination team.

Osama knew i was the only one who could bring him down so he had grown desperate to take me out.

I was doing my rounds in the parking lot when a lambo screeched to a halt 5.8 meters away, i was immediately suspicious as no one in the area (except me) drove one. Sensing impending danger i approached the ferrari (just like mine) drawing my platinum plated H&K mp5.

My heart beat slow and steady as 15 members of the elite hit squad piled out of the porsche 911 (not as nice as my carrera gt) and attempted to subdue me. Naturally i wasn't worried, as my black ops ss agent training allowed me to deal with as many as 100 terrorists at once.

So twin gold plated desert eagle .50s in hand i took out the 20 assassins with just 8 shots (yeah, i'm that badass).

Well long story short osama got scared and calling me begged me to stop my insane parking lot rampage. I agreed as long as he would stay in place for a few hours, and that's how i was able to lead seal team 6 to take him out.

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Old 04-11-2012, 05:51 AM   #12
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Wow, just wow what a bad azz.

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Old 04-11-2012, 05:53 AM   #13
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Yea, that's why I just stick to strip malls.

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Old 04-11-2012, 05:56 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kytowboater
Wow, just wow what a bad azz.
Well after 40 years of black ops experience you become badass enough to be like that. At the mall.

On a side note, in recognition of my awesomeness i'm having my 20th bday party at the pentagons super secret uber fun room this weekend
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Old 04-11-2012, 07:29 AM   #15
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This has to be a joke we cant have another one of these.

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Old 04-11-2012, 09:58 AM   #16
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Originally Posted by lbwar15 View Post
This has to be a joke we cant have another one of these. Even if it was true I don't see why people get so paranoid. I don't thank people would wast there time following someone bc they asked them to leave the mall.

And why take different routes to and from work? If some one was to follow me and start something it would make my day. I would even leave my gun in the truck when I got out at the red light to ask what the problem was (unless I thought they had a gun).
I do that MAINLY due to possible traffic conditions. Other times, I do it cuz I'm that bored when I drive.
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Old 04-11-2012, 10:37 AM   #17
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www.ranchhand.com
These guys make tactical bumpers. After you get the nasties buffed out of the armor plates of your APC these would make a nice front and rear addition. There's enough meat on em to mount belt fed side turrets on too so you can take down the roof mount. They also have tactical armored louvered covers for your rear glass too. Just food for thought.
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Old 04-11-2012, 01:59 PM   #18
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The only serious part about my post was about body damage books. Lol the mall ninja thread have me the idea for the story. In reality I have a 99 chevy burban and the dents and scratches show it Is a 13 year old car. Just some humor that's all.

My 23rd birthday is coming up... it's not going to be at the pentagon but on my air craft carrier that george sr. gave me for my years of dedicated service to his top secret attack force.

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Old 04-11-2012, 02:13 PM   #19
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Quote:
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So today was like any other day. I took my rout #4 to work today. Like every 2nd tuesday of every third month. (work a high risk job where I need to have multiple routs to and from work.) I noticed I was being followed by a black dodge van. So I took detour 4: 2a, threw a neighborhood, when all of a sudden a 2nd van burst out of a garage and pulled out in front of me. So I had to do my emergency maneuver 4: 2a-8 and escaped by bashing threw a fence and got back on a main road lost them threw a tunnel. Phew! luckily my tactical truck got me threw this situation, but without taking some hefty damage. Anyone know some good books to read on do it your self body repair. And what are some good products to get. I want my truck to look like new again.
Did you see any extraterrestrials out there while you were running around?
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Old 04-11-2012, 02:17 PM   #20
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My tin foil suit and helmet keeps them away. I wear it over my armor. =)

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