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Old 05-09-2013, 10:04 PM   #1741
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Funny Quotes :

America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked.
~ David Letterman
*****
I'm not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. God dammit, I'm a billionaire.
~ Howard Hughes
*****
After the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box.
~ Italian proverb
*****
Men are like linoleum floors. Lay'em right and you can walk all over them for thirty years.
~ Betsy Salkind
*****
The only reason they say 'Women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats.
~ Jean Kerr
*****
I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage.
~ Zsa Zsa Gabor
*****
You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.
~ Jeff Foxworthy
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When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.
~ Prince Philip
*****
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
~ Emo Philips.
*****
Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself.
~ Harrison Ford
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The best cure for sea sickness is to sit under a tree.
~ Spike Milligan
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Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke.
~ Robin Hall
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Kill one man and you're a murderer, kill a million and you're a conqueror.
~ Jean Rostand.
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Having more money doesn't make you happier. I have 50 million dollars but I'm just as happy as when I had 48 million.
~ Arnold Schwarzenegger.
*****
We are here on earth to do good unto others. What the others are here for, I have no idea.
~ WH Auden
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In hotel rooms I worry. I can't be the only guy who sits on the furniture naked.
~ Jonathan Katz
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If life were fair Elvis would still be alive today and all the impersonators would be dead.
~ Johnny Carson
*****
I don't believe in astrology. I am a Sagittarius and we're very skeptical.
~ Arthur C Clarke
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Hollywood must be the only place on earth where you can be fired by a man wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a baseball cap.
~ Steve Martin
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Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is.
~ Jimmy Durante
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As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind - every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.
~ John Glenn
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If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat?
~ Steven Wright
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America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric.
~ Doug Hamwell
*****


When the white missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we had the land. They said 'Let us pray.' We closed our eyes. When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land.
~ Desmond Tutu
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The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone.
~ George Roberts
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If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport.
~ Jonathan Winters
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I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.
~ Robert Benchley
****

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Old 05-10-2013, 02:13 PM   #1742
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If you are going to tell a person to go to Hell, you had better be willing to make him relish the trip.

Vikingdad

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"Among the many misdeeds of British rule in India, history will look upon the Act depriving a whole nation of arms as the blackest."
- Mohandas Gandhi, an Autobiography, page 446.
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Old 05-10-2013, 02:16 PM   #1743
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From : America's Persecuted Minority : Big Business, lecture, 11/17/61

" Every movement that seeks to enslave a country, every dictatorship or potential dictatorship, needs some minority group as a scapegoat which it can blame for the nation's troubles and use as a justification of its own demands for dictatorial powers . In Soviet Russia, the scapegoat was the bourgeoisie ; in NAZI Germany, it was the Jewish people; in America, it is the businessmen . "

" A disastrous intellectual package-deal, put over on us by the theoretitians of statism, is the equation of economic power with political power . "

" Let me repeat it : a government holds a legal monopoly on the use of physical force . "

" The nature of governmental action is : coercive action . "

" The only proper function of a government in a free country is to act as an agency which protects the individual's rights , i.e., which protects the individual from physical violence . "

" A proper government has the right to use physical force only in retaliation and only against those who initiate its use. "

" A statist is a man who believes that some men have the right to force, coerce, endslave, rob, and murder others. "

" What is economic power ? It is the power to produce and to trade what one has produced . "

" In a free market, all prices, wages, and profits are determined--not by the arbitrary whim of the rich or of the poor, not by anyone's "greed" or by anyone's need--but by the law of supply and demand . "

" The businessman's tool is values . The bureaucrat's tool is fear . "

" A system of pure , unregulated laissez-faire capitalism has never yet existed anywhere. "

" All of the evils, abuses, and iniquities, popularly ascribed to the businessmen and to capitalism, were not caused by an unregulated economy or by a free market, but by government intervention into the economy . "
-Ayn Rand 1961-

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Old 05-11-2013, 05:36 PM   #1744
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If you are going to tell a person to go to Hell, you had better be willing to make him relish the trip.

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The true gift of gab.....
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Old 05-12-2013, 03:47 PM   #1745
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The true gift of gab.....
Go to Hell!
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Quote:
"Among the many misdeeds of British rule in India, history will look upon the Act depriving a whole nation of arms as the blackest."
- Mohandas Gandhi, an Autobiography, page 446.
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Old 05-24-2013, 04:29 AM   #1746
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On Dying : “It’s been coming for years, but you just don’t expect it. Superman just doesn’t die, right? You can’t ask a guy like me why [I performed]. I really wanted to fly through the air. I was a daredevil, a performer. I loved the thrill, the money, the whole macho thing. All those things made me Evel Knievel. Sure, I was scared. You gotta be an ass not to be scared. But I beat the hell out of death.”


“If someone says to you, ‘that guy should have never jumped the canyon. You knew if he did, that he’d lose his life and that he was crazy.’ Do me a favor. Tell him that you saw me here and regardless of what I was, that you knew me, and that I kept my word.”


" I think that a little alcohol in one's system...is a whole lot better than none at all ! "


" Nobody ever gave me anything . Anything I got, I either earned it or stole it. "
-Evel Knievel-

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Old 05-24-2013, 04:39 AM   #1747
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]"Money is the tool of men who have reached a high level of productivity and a long-range control over their lives. Money is not merely a tool of exchange: much more importantly, it is a tool of saving, which permits delayed consumption and buys time for future production. To fulfill this requirement, money has to be some material commodity which is imperishable, rare, homogeneous, easily stored, not subject to wide fluctuations of value, and always in demand among those you trade with. This leads you to the decision to use gold as money. Gold money is a tangible value in itself and a token of wealth actually produced. When you accept a gold coin in payment for your goods, you actually deliver the goods to the buyer; the transaction is as safe as simple barter. When you store your savings in the form of gold coins, they represent the goods which you have actually produced and which have gone to buy time for other producers, who will keep the productive process going, so that you’ll be able to trade your coins for goods any time you wish. "
-Ayn Rand-

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Old 05-24-2013, 02:16 PM   #1748
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On Dying : “It’s been coming for years, but you just don’t expect it. Superman just doesn’t die, right? You can’t ask a guy like me why [I performed]. I really wanted to fly through the air. I was a daredevil, a performer. I loved the thrill, the money, the whole macho thing. All those things made me Evel Knievel. Sure, I was scared. You gotta be an ass not to be scared. But I beat the hell out of death.”


“If someone says to you, ‘that guy should have never jumped the canyon. You knew if he did, that he’d lose his life and that he was crazy.’ Do me a favor. Tell him that you saw me here and regardless of what I was, that you knew me, and that I kept my word.”


" I think that a little alcohol in one's system...is a whole lot better than none at all ! "


" Nobody ever gave me anything . Anything I got, I either earned it or stole it. "
-Evel Knievel-
I met Evel Knievel back in 1988 up in Portland when his son, Robbie, was doing a big jump at the races that I was working at. It was really strange meeting him because by then he was a very broken down old man. You could just about hear all of the broken bones, pins, plates, etc.creaking as he walked (with a gold plated and ebony cane no less!). He was nice enough though the meeting was brief. I don't think I envy him though after all we have heard about him. He was a survivor though. That can't be denied.
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Quote:
"Among the many misdeeds of British rule in India, history will look upon the Act depriving a whole nation of arms as the blackest."
- Mohandas Gandhi, an Autobiography, page 446.
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Old 05-24-2013, 02:34 PM   #1749
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"IF YOUR FEELING TOUGH AND WANT TO MESS WITH ME , DON,T , AND SPARE ME SOME PAIN..! "

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Old 05-25-2013, 03:07 AM   #1750
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“The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
- Anne Morris

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