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Old 05-12-2012, 07:37 PM   #11
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My soon to be ex said she wanted half my guns. (i guess since I only have three, I should saw one in half?) I told her I wanted half the tampons she'll be buying from now until she hits menopause, since I have about as much use for them as she does for my guns.
Congrats on your soon to be freedom.

You'll enjoy it.

It's great to be single-again.

And then you will forget about her.
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Old 05-12-2012, 08:41 PM   #12
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Here ya go

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Old 05-12-2012, 09:05 PM   #13
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Here ya go
That's hilarious, thank you for making me laugh.
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Old 05-13-2012, 12:12 AM   #14
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So...the other day my wife and I were doing some yard work. She had just moved a bag of potting soil over to one of her large pots and I realized she did not have anything to help her open the bag.

Being a gentlemen, I patted my trusty pocket folder and asked her if she'd like my knife?

She rolled her eyes and informed me that "not once" in her life has she ever needed a pocket kife and used her trowel to open the bag.

Being a little anoyed at her snarky reply I offered that "not once" in my life had I ever needed a cotex, did that mean they were not useful?

I thought it was pretty funny but apparently feminine hygene jokes are lost on the fairer sex?

Tack
If I may share some insight here; it's because it sucks so much that any reminder of the whole ordeal just isn't funny.

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Originally Posted by trip286 View Post
My soon to be ex said she wanted half my guns. (i guess since I only have three, I should saw one in half?) I told her I wanted half the tampons she'll be buying from now until she hits menopause, since I have about as much use for them as she does for my guns.
If she has no use for them, well, that's just mean and I'd like to kick her in the shins, I don't like it when people do things just to be mean.

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Here ya go
You might also get kicked in the shins, bu not by me, that did make me smile just a little.
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Old 05-13-2012, 12:19 AM   #15
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Originally Posted by trip286 View Post
My soon to be ex said she wanted half my guns. (i guess since I only have three, I should saw one in half?) I told her I wanted half the tampons she'll be buying from now until she hits menopause, since I have about as much use for them as she does for my guns.
What guns? You sold all your guns to that nice guy for $1. Remember?
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Old 05-13-2012, 12:25 AM   #16
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What guns? You sold all your guns to that nice guy for $1. Remember?
Nah, he gave them to me for a hug.
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Old 05-13-2012, 12:26 AM   #17
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Originally Posted by Cinderocka1989

Nah, he gave them to me for a hug.
One hell of a hug!
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Old 05-13-2012, 12:28 AM   #18
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One hell of a hug!
Well, yeah, it was from me...
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Old 05-13-2012, 12:32 AM   #19
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Originally Posted by Cinderocka1989

Well, yeah, it was from me...
I have a feelin that man is over the moon fer ya.
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Old 05-13-2012, 12:34 AM   #20
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Originally Posted by kytowboater

I have a feelin that man is over the moon fer ya.
She's hot, nice, and likes big trucks and bikes! What's not to like? I think it would take more than a hug to part me from my 1911 though...
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