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Old 03-03-2013, 05:31 AM   #151
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A good friend of mine whom I used to work with got married about the same time I did, we have kids the same age, etc. We used to do lots of family stuff together. But he is a slut. Has been all his life, or at least since high school. He used to keep a "little black book" with all of his "conquests" noted down. It was like a small (all female) town phone book. He burned it (yes, actually burned it. In a ritual at his bachelor party. I was there) in preparation of his impending wedding. He had every intention of sticking to his vows. Eventually he slipped back into his philandering ways though and ended up getting divorced. Now he lives with another buddy who is just like him. A regular bachelor pad with all of the debauchery.

Leopards can't change their spots.

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Old 03-03-2013, 06:26 PM   #152
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Get a lawyer, not about winning or taking advantage but just to get all the "I"s dotted and the "T"s crossed.Will most likely save some troubles down the road.

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Old 03-04-2013, 12:36 AM   #153
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Get a lawyer, not about winning or taking advantage but just to get all the "I"s dotted and the "T"s crossed.Will most likely save some troubles down the road.
This is a good point. I have heard of many cases where somebody got remarried thinking they were no longer married to the ex, come to find out they weren't.
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Old 03-04-2013, 07:51 PM   #154
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sad to say, but IMO this marriage is doomed. they got married for the wrong reasons and not any of the right ones. personally also, i don't feel all the counseling in the world will do any good. sounds like not enough give on both parts and the poor child is the one who is going to suffer the most. i hope i'm wrong, but have seen it too many times in the past. just my observation.
You are not the first person to say that it might be doomed. I saw them again this weekend; I seriously think the kid might be better off with some other couple or something. I KNOW without a doubt that the shooting buddy would be better off without the wife, whew; i am far from perfect and not the most patient person i know, but i would have already left her and taken the kid. I told him that the kid could grow up with a twitch if he couldn't get her a hearing aide or somehow get her to stop yelling everything to everyone.
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Old 03-04-2013, 11:36 PM   #155
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You are not the first person to say that it might be doomed. I saw them again this weekend; I seriously think the kid might be better off with some other couple or something. I KNOW without a doubt that the shooting buddy would be better off without the wife, whew; i am far from perfect and not the most patient person i know, but i would have already left her and taken the kid. I told him that the kid could grow up with a twitch if he couldn't get her a hearing aide or somehow get her to stop yelling everything to everyone.
not trying to be mean, just pragmatic and have seen it too many times in the past. a marriage for the sake that the woman or girl is pregnant is most times doomed. better would be, that they never married he took care of his child and act responsible and be a father, and not a husband.

seriously i doubt counseling or a pastor or anything will save that marriage. it's just not built on the right foundation. many people marry for the wrong reasons and just because someone is pregnant, is one of them IMO.
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Old 03-05-2013, 04:00 AM   #156
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You are not the first person to say that it might be doomed. I saw them again this weekend; I seriously think the kid might be better off with some other couple or something. I KNOW without a doubt that the shooting buddy would be better off without the wife, whew; i am far from perfect and not the most patient person i know, but i would have already left her and taken the kid. I told him that the kid could grow up with a twitch if he couldn't get her a hearing aide or somehow get her to stop yelling everything to everyone.
Yeah, if its that bad it may be time to put a fork in it.
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Old 03-05-2013, 04:57 AM   #157
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On the lighter side. Do you know why divorce is so expensive? Because it's worth it.

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Old 03-05-2013, 08:19 AM   #158
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not trying to be mean, just pragmatic and have seen it too many times in the past. a marriage for the sake that the woman or girl is pregnant is most times doomed. better would be, that they never married he took care of his child and act responsible and be a father, and not a husband.

seriously i doubt counseling or a pastor or anything will save that marriage. it's just not built on the right foundation. many people marry for the wrong reasons and just because someone is pregnant, is one of them IMO.
I think you are right Axxe. That would be why Fathead got married and look how that turned out..... Eek!!!!
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Old 03-05-2013, 09:22 AM   #159
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I think you are right Axxe. That would be why Fathead got married and look how that turned out..... Eek!!!!
many people go into that type of marriage with good intentions of doing the right thing, but it usually ends badly for all involved. very seldom do these marriages work.

like i said not being mean, just realistic and pragmatic.
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Old 03-05-2013, 11:37 AM   #160
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I have gone through two divorces,, the second was easier simply because I knew what to expect. Definitely get a lawyer, follow his advice as much as possible, discuss the details with no one,, it will get back to your spouse no matter what one may think. You will have troubles with the child support bureau whether you did anything wrong or not, prepare to be treated poorly by the court system. I have heard that civil courts don't try to be as politically correct as at one time, so if you have a good job you will not be considered a lamb for slaughter. No matter what you let her have now, it means nothing in a final settlement,, they are considered gifts for the most part since you are legally married. Simply prepare yourself for things you will think cannot happen and remember neither party really wins,, unless it is a celebrity thing,, and you will get over it and keep the kid safely out of the proceedings and do your best to let the child know it is not their fault or anything.

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