dietary tips for your toddler
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Old 01-08-2009, 09:12 PM   #1
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Default dietary tips for your toddler

Sweet baby Jesus!

My wife and I usually feed our 16 month old son what we're eating for dinner. This supposedly exposes them to a broad range of flavors and prevents them from becoming fussy eaters later in life.

Last night, we had chicken, bacon supreme pizza for dinner. The toppings on this pizza consist of grilled chicken, spinach, pickled artichoke hearts, bacon, garlic and feta cheese.

At some point in time between dinner last night, at 6:30 PM and 30 minutes ago, my son's digestive tract was able to take those ingredients and form them into the most god awful substance that I have ever had the misfortune of smelling.

The aroma that assaulted me when I removed his diaper was a hearty blend of hot road kill, rotten garlic, swamp gas and Indian food.

If you have a Papa Murphy's in your area, learn from my mistakes and do not feed you infant children their Chicken Bacon Artichoke deLite pizza. You may not live to regret it.

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Old 01-08-2009, 09:20 PM   #2
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LMAO - Don't have kids and don't like artichokes, but I will keep that in mind...

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Old 01-08-2009, 09:22 PM   #3
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Thank you for your sacrifice. It may have just saved lives. That pizza sounds wonderful...

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Old 01-08-2009, 09:26 PM   #4
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Thank you for your sacrifice. It may have just saved lives. That pizza sounds wonderful...
The only way you can screw up something that has bacon and garlic on it is by putting artichoke hearts on it. Fortunately, they peel off easily and leave little flavor behind.

You guys should have a Papa Murphy's in your area by now.
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Old 01-08-2009, 09:34 PM   #5
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I am a bit older than 16 months, but I am forbidden from eating broccoli and cheese.

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Old 01-08-2009, 09:45 PM   #6
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The only way you can screw up something that has bacon and garlic on it is by putting artichoke hearts on it. Fortunately, they peel off easily and leave little flavor behind.

You guys should have a Papa Murphy's in your area by now.
I love artichoke hearts on pizza. No Papa Murphy's in TX that I am aware of, but having lived on the left coast my most of my life, I know them well. I can take it or leave it.
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Old 01-08-2009, 10:38 PM   #7
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That's why i try to get my pizza at Dominos.

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Old 01-09-2009, 01:41 AM   #8
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Regular food can do that as well to small children.

At about 2 months old my EXWIFE and her wonderful family put my daughter in the hospital because 8 people were smoking in a single wide trailer with 1 window open 2". So my daughter was placed into an O2 tent and my wife went into change her diaper. At the exact time my wife lifter her butt up off the old diaper my daughter let go of the biggest stools I had see a child that small have. The really bad part was the fact that it came out in a very fine mist like substance that looked like some one was using a HVLP spray gun. Upon hitting the atmosphere it left a very fine stinky mist all over the tent and over 3/4 of my ex wife's upper torso, I being the ladies man I was then fell to the floor Laughing so loud that I was asked to leave the floor. So I went home and gathered new clothing for my wife at the time. I just said well that is what you get for putting her in there.

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Old 01-09-2009, 01:46 AM   #9
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Regular food can do that as well to small children.

At about 2 months old my EXWIFE and her wonderful family put my daughter in the hospital because 8 people were smoking in a single wide trailer with 1 window open 2". So my daughter was placed into an O2 tent and my wife went into change her diaper. At the exact time my wife lifter her butt up off the old diaper my daughter let go of the biggest stools I had see a child that small have. The really bad part was the fact that it came out in a very fine mist like substance that looked like some one was using a HVLP spray gun. Upon hitting the atmosphere it left a very fine stinky mist all over the tent and over 3/4 of my ex wife's upper torso, I being the ladies man I was then fell to the floor Laughing so loud that I was asked to leave the floor. So I went home and gathered new clothing for my wife at the time. I just said well that is what you get for putting her in there.
Karma is a mother ****er.
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Old 01-09-2009, 08:32 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cpttango30 View Post
Regular food can do that as well to small children.

At about 2 months old my EXWIFE and her wonderful family put my daughter in the hospital because 8 people were smoking in a single wide trailer with 1 window open 2". So my daughter was placed into an O2 tent and my wife went into change her diaper. At the exact time my wife lifter her butt up off the old diaper my daughter let go of the biggest stools I had see a child that small have. The really bad part was the fact that it came out in a very fine mist like substance that looked like some one was using a HVLP spray gun. Upon hitting the atmosphere it left a very fine stinky mist all over the tent and over 3/4 of my ex wife's upper torso, I being the ladies man I was then fell to the floor Laughing so loud that I was asked to leave the floor. So I went home and gathered new clothing for my wife at the time. I just said well that is what you get for putting her in there.
damn shame, i hate it when people dont leave the room or house to smoke around infants and toddlers. not bad mouthing any one by the way. i used to freeze by a$$ off inthe winter time and that got me to quit, then for some dumb reason i started up again. ive been without smokes now recently for about 21/2 months now with the exception of new years eve i had two. but im back on track now. but yes babies have the most terrible things come out of them for being so damn cute
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