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Old 05-06-2009, 05:02 PM   #1
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Default Country Colloquiallisms

Inspired in part by the old guy (whom I'm convinced is Cane) in the stellar Walker Texas Ranger series, and by HillBilly in the Bunker (viewable only to supporting members, won't you join today?), share your favorite. I'm curious just how many people speak this way.

My entry:

Well dip my butt in cream and squat me in a room full of kittens.

Top that.

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Old 05-06-2009, 05:09 PM   #2
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More fun then a butt load of gerbils.
from Richard Gere's home town
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Old 05-06-2009, 09:18 PM   #3
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Shakin' like a dog sh*ttin' peach pits

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Old 05-06-2009, 09:40 PM   #4
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He couldn’t pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel.

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Old 05-06-2009, 09:44 PM   #5
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I’m as anxious as a one-eyed cat watching two rat holes.

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Old 05-06-2009, 10:48 PM   #6
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How about: Crazier that a shat house rat. And: More crooked than a dogs hind leg pissin' in the snow.

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Old 05-06-2009, 11:08 PM   #7
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"It's comin' up a bad cloud." (thunderstorm is coming)

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Old 05-06-2009, 11:17 PM   #8
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Also: Raining like a double cu*ted cow pissin' on a flat rock.

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Old 05-06-2009, 11:18 PM   #9
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Crazier than a bag of squirls

On it like a fat kid on a donut

Dumb as a box of rocks

Stressed as a one legged man in a azz kicking contest

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Old 05-06-2009, 11:23 PM   #10
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Or: On it like a duck on a June bug.

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