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Old 06-15-2009, 10:29 PM   #11
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So you are Canebreak. What you don't know is that he is a self-loathing, neighbor hating dog. You wake up one day and realize that age has enlarged your prostate to the size of a basketball. You can't pee, but you try so hard that you pop some blood vessels in your eyes so you can't see. No use having some cool arse Colt 1911's and one bad arse Fernirr .460 that you can't shoot any more. So in your own self pity you decide to sit outside and just waste away. The iguanas realize that you can't see, and they slowly take you down, bite by bite. The next time your lovely daughter comes to visit, she finds you nothing but a skeleton sitting in fossilized crap. She takes your pistols and runs off with a scum bag and lives the rest of her life robbing banks with your guns to feed her boyfriend's heroin habit.

What, too much? (no offense Cane, my brother)


I wish I was Superman.

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...without the Second, we cannot protect the rest!

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Old 06-15-2009, 11:52 PM   #12
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Granted you are Superman but you should have read the fine print as you are now have the lead in a gay porno. Superman takes on all at gitmo.

That might be too much...sorry SC

I wish I were President of the United States

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Old 06-16-2009, 12:35 AM   #13
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(not too much, spirit of the thread, imo)

You are the President of the US, but congress has an anti majority and BO's Supreme Court appointments make you the homeless guy down the street. Your hands are tied no matter how hard you try. You end up putting in your notice after only 2 years in office. A nasty woman comes forward and claims that her kid is yours. Your political career is ruined, but you leave the country with some hot babe and you are never heard from again.

I wish I had the money to leave the country only to be never heard from again.

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Old 06-16-2009, 12:47 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by skullcrusher View Post
(not too much, spirit of the thread, imo)

You are the President of the US, but congress has an anti majority and BO's Supreme Court appointments make you the homeless guy down the street. Your hands are tied no matter how hard you try. You end up putting in your notice after only 2 years in office. A nasty woman comes forward and claims that her kid is yours. Your political career is ruined, but you leave the country with some hot babe and you are never heard from again.

I wish I had the money to leave the country only to be never heard from again.
Done, you die on a mountain climbing trip in the Andes that you paid for with every last penny, because you told no one your plans and you recently moved and quit your job, no one notices you left.

I wish I could lost 15 pounds.
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Old 06-16-2009, 12:51 AM   #15
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I wish I had the money to leave the country only to be never heard from again.
Which requires a surprising small amount of money. As your private plane takes off (see my wish at the end of page 1) your plane crashes into the sea due to poor airworthiness but you survive. However before your rescue sharks are able to take your feet below the ankles, then your wrists followed by your nose. The next thing they take is your left eye followed by the right. Lastly your tongue is taken, leaving you mute and never heard from again. However your ears remain perfect so that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish, every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out: "Dear God, what is that thing?" will echo in your perfect ears.
PS: Obama uses you a poster child for government sponsored health care as you lacked private insurance. You are unable to say anything against this and are taken around the country as the symbol and proof of the success of the democratic liberals across the country.
(ok, maybe to far )

"To the pain - Princess Bride"

I wish I could live forever.
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Old 06-16-2009, 12:54 AM   #16
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I wish I could lost 15 pounds.
You beat me to posting while I was typing, YOU SHALL PAY DEARLY!!!

You lose your 15 pounds but are unable to stop. Over the next several months you continue to lose weight until Nicole Richie has an intervention on your behalf but alas it is to late and you die a horrible death due to starvation.

I still wish I could live forever.
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Old 06-16-2009, 01:03 AM   #17
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Originally Posted by Yunus View Post
Which requires a surprising small amount of money. As your private plane takes off (see my wish at the end of page 1) your plane crashes into the sea due to poor airworthiness but you survive. However before your rescue sharks are able to take your feet below the ankles, then your wrists followed by your nose. The next thing they take is your left eye followed by the right. Lastly your tongue is taken, leaving you mute and never heard from again. However your ears remain perfect so that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish, every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out: "Dear God, what is that thing?" will echo in your perfect ears.
PS: Obama uses you a poster child for government sponsored health care as you lacked private insurance. You are unable to say anything against this and are taken around the country as the symbol and proof of the success of the democratic liberals across the country.
(ok, maybe to far )

"To the pain - Princess Bride"
Snot bubble laughing right there! I am still laughing, and that is no joke!!
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...without the Second, we cannot protect the rest!
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Old 06-16-2009, 01:10 AM   #18
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Originally Posted by Yunus View Post
I still wish I could live forever.

Ok, you live forever. You witness the globalizaton of Socialism. Centuries past the Obama World States collapse, you witness the Revolution of the Man Hating Women. All vaginas are sewn shut. Eventually, there are no women available to fonicate and reproduce. Humans die out, and you decide that dolphins are pretty...


I wish I had 3 more wishes...
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...without the Second, we cannot protect the rest!

Last edited by skullcrusher; 06-16-2009 at 01:12 AM.
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Old 06-16-2009, 01:23 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by skullcrusher View Post
(not too much, spirit of the thread, imo)

You are the President of the US, but congress has an anti majority and BO's Supreme Court appointments make you the homeless guy down the street. Your hands are tied no matter how hard you try. You end up putting in your notice after only 2 years in office. A nasty woman comes forward and claims that her kid is yours. Your political career is ruined, but you leave the country with some hot babe and you are never heard from again.

I wish I had the money to leave the country only to be never heard from again.
Dam pretty much how I visioned my polititical career
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Originally Posted by Benning Boy View Post
If you're really bored, I'm your huckleberry. If you really want a challenge, I'm the one.

If you're really smart, you'll just peddle your paint.
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Old 06-16-2009, 01:24 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ubergopher View Post
I wish I could lost 15 pounds.
Ok, you get to lose 15 pounds, but it is in elephantitus of the nuts. Each nut grows to 7.5 pounds each. You lose the weight by castration. Unick you be not, but are so.


I still wish I had 3 more wishes.
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Skullcrusher, you are evil, sick, demented, twisted- and my hero!


Quote:
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...without the Second, we cannot protect the rest!
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