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Old 12-30-2012, 02:51 AM   #11
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Had to let wifey read it!!

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Old 12-30-2012, 02:57 AM   #12
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We'll see how this goes over...

A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement.

He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names like "X" and "Y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns" but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philosopher Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle."

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President. It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow

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Old 12-30-2012, 11:46 AM   #13
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All of them are good.

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Old 12-31-2012, 03:27 PM   #14
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A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one
carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6.

A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk .

The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk?"

He replied, "They had avocados."

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