In a family argument, if it turns out you're right, apologize at once!
Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors, and miss.
Never try to out stubborn a cat.
Everybody lies about sex.
A committee is a life form with six or more legs and no brain.
Every thing in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites! Moderation is for monks!
Sex should be friendly. Otherwise stick to mechanical toys, it's more sanitary.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
With apologies to Lazarus Long (Robert Heinlein)