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The Aussie Explorer

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Old 09-04-2010, 10:31 AM   #1
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Default The Aussie Explorer

Three explorers; one English, one French and one Australian were tracking through the Amazon when they were captured by the native headhunters of the area. They were taken back to the camp by the river and were told by the chief, "Each of you will die today, but being the honourable people we are, we will allow each of you to choose the way in which to be killed".

After some deliberation the Englishman requests a pistol.
"Long Live the Queen!" he cries before shooting himself in the head.

The Frenchman and the Australian watch in horror as the headhunters skin his body and use it to make a raft.

The Frenchman requests a dagger and yells "Viva Le France!" before garrotting himself. Once again the Aussie looks on as the headhunters skin the body and make him into a raft.

After some thought the Australian asks for a fork. The headhunters are bewildered but oblige and hand the explorer the fork. Grabbing it and immediately starting to wildly stab himself all over the Australian laughs manically “So much for your fcuking boat!”

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Old 09-04-2010, 05:07 PM   #2
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Now, that's quick thinking.

“If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen.”Samuel Adams
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Old 09-05-2010, 02:22 AM   #3
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Someone just told me this joke last night..... lol, how ironic.
"This is my rifle, this is my gun." "This is for fighting, this is for fun." -Full Metal Jacket

"I joined the Navy to drink in foreign countries and fornicate." -unknown
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Old 09-06-2010, 10:51 PM   #4
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I sent it to a couple Aussie buddies......

One old ex-SF trooper in particular - I could easily see him doing this!
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Old 09-07-2010, 05:57 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by Bigdog57 View Post
One old ex-SF trooper in particular - I could easily see him doing this!
My first thought too, heh

Illigitimi Non Carborundum - Don't let the bastards grind you down

Originally Posted by skullcrusher View Post
Yes, at WalMart, you can pick up a gun, ammo, ski mask and your antidepressants all in one trip. Darn convenient if you ask me...:D
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